Medicine Soldier

Dénouement

2006-01-03T03:47:00.000+03:00

(Written 17:47 US Central time 12.12.2005)

After a couple of quiet weeks acclimating to "civilian life" and being the go-between with our deployed chain of command and our home chain of command, I was ready to get some work done. I am usually a person with a purpose or something to do. It stresses me out a little when there is nothing going on or something to accomplish. Still be careful what you ask for.

We heard reports from Iraq about the elections. Just like October the elections were tensely boring and there were no attacks in our area until after the elections. Our camp received a rocket attack on Christmas day, but the majority of our troops had already left.

Meanwhile at the demobilization station, we were ready to receive over 1,500 soldiers before the holidays and try to process them before the holiday shutdown. We made frequent trips to Gulfport to receive the units coming home. We tried hard to vigorously and enthusiastically greet every single soldier coming off the planes. Although it was great to see everyone home and look for people I had not seen since early in the deployment or worked more closely with, it was almost like the end of Return of the King with the continuing endings. Our fellowship was over four thousand and after greeting the first couple hundred, or when it was the fourth consecutive plane in 24 hours of no sleep, it was hard to smile and welcome these guys and girls home. Still, everyone did their part and deserved a warm welcome home.

Our company of Yankees wasn't quite home yet. Everyone else from the brigade was relatively close to home and were released to their families for the holidays. The first sergeant and I were to play surrogate families to the guys in our company, knowing they would be home for good in a week and we would still be here with the next groups.

We have a great group of guys and I am proud of them. We chose to give them options and treat them like the adults and veterans they are. We gave them warnings about alcohol use and decompression and then allowed them to make choices. Thus far they have done a great job and if I am to spend the holidays away from my family, I am glad it is this bunch.

After I caught up on my sleep from the marathon of arriving planes, we spent Christmas Eve playing cards, eating chips, and watching TV. There was some retelling of war stories and sharing plans for homecoming. I stayed up late watching a Sci-Fi marathon of the new Battlestar Galactica. Christmas day I sat in the laundromat washing my uniforms while I called my family at home. We took our group to the casinos in Biloxi after Christmas. I had a good time, I even snuck into watch King Kong. I enjoyed the movie and the special effects. I could not help thinking about my year in Iraq after the movie. Man's quest for fortune, fame, profit, or adventure leaves a long lasting impression on the world. I still do not care to comment whether the reasons for going to Iraq were sound reasons, but like in King Kong, our presence in a foreign environment has had permanent and lasting effects.

The week blew by; we ran around between the administrative buildings, medical buildings, and the gym where they were giving benefits briefings. I spent the majority of my time shuttling all the soldiers between the buildings and ensuring my soldiers has their state-specific requirements met. The first third of the company was done and ready for their last flight of the tour. I shook their hands, some for the last time as their enlistments are up; others I would see again, hopefully in a different capacity. Before bed I received an email from my state Brigade commander supporting my advancement. It is comforting to know my efforts have not gone unnoticed. We received two-thirds more of the company over the next two days. This group was a little bigger and their use of days off was a little more colorful than the last. We allowed them to stay off post and they did a great job checking in.

I had an excellent New Year! Although we went to the same club that we went to last year, I had a completely different experience. Last year we celebrated our last breaths of freedom before we headed off to the desert where we were no longer allowed certain comforts and faced the probability of not coming back. This year we celebrated several things: everyone safely out of Iraq (we still have several soldiers waiting in Kuwait) and beginning a new life with new eyes on the world. With new friends and old, it was a very happy and fulfilling night.

I am not sure I have ever articulated to my audience why I am writing. My evaluation reports have often and repeatedly indicated that I am a "quiet, thoughtful, and professional officer". I had feared that if I did not return from Iraq, my "quiet thoughtfulness" would result in anonymity. That is, no one would really know what I am thinking, how I am feeling or more importantly who I am. My way of dealing with my mortality started off as e-mails principally to my family and co-workers so at least they could see the products of their nurturing and encouragement. What was intended for a small group of people has cascaded beyond the limits of my expectations and intentions. I have received supportive e-mails from around the world and been thanked personally on New Year's by wives of my soldiers.

Looking forward to a new year, and a new beginning, I will continue to write (both prose and poetry) and see who will follow and share my path, my journey.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

On the Road Home, or The Lost Journal Entries

2005-12-13T05:04:00.000+03:00

(Written 20:04 US Central time 12.12.2005)

It's the blogmistress here, posting at 21:04 US Eastern time on 12.12.2005. Those of you who stop by here often have probably been wondering what has happened with Scott, since he hasn't posted since October 30. The short answer is that he's been fine, just busy getting ready to come home. While he hasn't had time to post, he has done a little writing here and there. Those thoughts are posted below, under the dates on which they were written.

I'll Live, I Guess

2005-12-13T03:06:00.000+03:00

(Written 18:06 US Central time 12.12.2005)

I survived a year in Iraq without even losing a sock. I still think I owe it to the overwhelming support back home and everyone praying for me. It is a war of chance over there. Some people went out everyday and never had to fire a shot, while others were just going from one camp to another for something minor and had their lives changed forever. I had my share of events from midnight raids to visiting the schools and handing out supplies.

I learned a lot this year about Iraq, the Army, and even myself. It has been physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausting. Though I have not changed too much physically, I am looking forward to the next chapter in my life where I can move on mentally and emotionally from this year. For now, I will wait here for the rest of my soldiers to join me here and help them in their transition home.

Nothing Eire So Green

2005-12-11T22:00:00.000+03:00

(Written 12.11.2005, posted 12.12.2005)

Three seasons in one day.

We left sandy Kuwait at 81 degrees and descended into Ireland. As we broke through the clouds, everything was green again. We landed in the rolling green countryside of Ireland. It was a quick stop but great to see shades of green again.

Our second stop was in Maine covered in powdery white snow. Our comrades from our sister companies teased us because we were closer to home than we would be when we finally left the plane. If I had known about our stop, I could have had a welcoming committee and showed them some northern hospitality.

Onward to the south, we landed in Mississippi. Many of the other soldiers did not have a chance to see their homes since the hurricane, and there was anxiety amongst them. We were all relieved to see businesses running despite the damage still to roofs and billboards. There are still teams from FEMA here, and our mobilization site is still churning out soldiers to leave for the Middle East. We thought we had left the land of explosions, but the deploying soldiers are training with simulations and blank rounds. The second time we heard explosions and gun fire, we just shook our heads.

Caught in the Big Machine

2005-12-08T22:00:00.000+03:00

(Written 12.08.2005, posted 12.12.2005)

The last few days at camp, we made some extra time to spend with the guys in the unit. We realized once again that things are changing, yet things could get bad before the end. We spent time enjoying a few "good" meals, and we had one last trilogy for movie nights. We spent three nights watching Gladiator, Braveheart, and The Patriot. Perhaps we were trying to relate to the heroic ideals, warrior ethos, or just share in some kind of brotherhood brought about by war.

I left the camp to play the hurry-up-and-wait game, carrying everything I still owned in theater on my back. There are things you just get used to and expect when being in the army. Even on the civilian side, when traveling they tell you to show up two to four hours early when checking in to the airport. We found ourselves sitting on our bags for twelve hours on the flight line, as our flight time ping-ponged between 9am and 9pm all day. Then it was the same in Kuwait. "Go sit in your tent and don't go far because your plane and customs could be ready in 15 minutes or three days." I actually enjoyed the time in Kuwait. I was reading some books and catching up on my journal. It was somewhat peaceful, and we had time to reflect on things again. Then before we expected, it was time to go and wait again on the airplane.

The Last...

2005-12-01T22:00:00.000+03:00

(Written 12.01.2005, posted 12.12.2005)

In trying to mentally prepare myself for coming home, I often thought about the usual duties and activities. I thought about my last hair cut in Iraq, my last trip to the laundry, my last inventory, and even my last patrol. It was an easy logistics run to another camp in order to pick up supplies. It was my last look at the streets of Iraq with the open air markets, children playing, and livestock in the roads. It was uneventful for the most part. I turned in all my patrol gear a few days later and felt almost naked. Still, I had only a few days to make sure my counterpart was well prepared, pack my living area, and go through the usual hurry-up-and-wait military movement routine. Now onward to Baghdad.

Black Friday

2005-11-25T22:00:00.000+03:00

(Written 11.25.2005, posted 12.12.2005)

After Thanksgiving, we were hoping for a quiet Friday, and it is usually a slow afternoon since it is a big prayer day and most of the meetings we have are in the morning. Unfortunately, we had an indirect fire attack. It was unclear whether the attack was directed at us or the local schools and police stations. Once again, all the radios were filled with traffic attempting to locate the source, ascertain damage, get accountability, and put together a counter mortar response. Later on that night, all our platoons were out encountering roadside bombs. Thankfully, some were not well put together and did not achieve the desired effect. I stayed up all night on radio watch until everyone came back in safely.

Saturday was busy with administrative issues and I have been mentally and physically exhausted. I have not even been keeping up with my emails, except for duty-related responses to our missions and movement.

I Am Thankful for...

2005-11-24T22:00:00.000+03:00

(Written 11.24.2005, posted 12.12.2005)

Most people would not believe the dinning accommodations we have here. Most of the camps host contract dining facilities with third country (non-Iraqi) nationals cooking and serving the food, very much like a large college dining hall with short order, main line, buffet, salad bar, and desert bar. Our camp is still using cooks in a trailer. During the summer months the drains to the air conditioners, when they were working, just poured the condensate on the dusty concrete floor. The KPs (kitchen police) would do a good job washing off the vinyl tables and then pick the chairs off the dirty floor and put them on the tables.

However, on Thanksgiving, we had nice table cloths, a full meal with desserts, and even egg nog. Apple pie never tasted soo good. Although I was sad not to be with my extended family for the first time since I can remember, it felt good to sit down with my new extended family and express the bonds we share from our experiences this year. Growing up in New England, Thanksgiving has been a holiday stereotypically depicted by posters of Pilgrims and Indians coming together for a pre-winter feast. I was curious to see how the Mississippi Brigade would display their decorations even in Iraq.

We are supposed to be sensitive towards our Muslim counterparts, and I thought it would be a good opportunity to exchange traditions or stories with the interpreters, considering they had recently finished Ramadan. Our spread looked more like the typical cornucopia with no indications of a religious nature except a few paper dolls in puritan dress. The locals did not seem to be bothered by our secular representation of the American Indian tradition.

I have been fortunate enough to have been involved in the American Indian community for over 14 years. My friend and mentor from South Dakota, a few friends, and I usually get together at the hospital he works at to explain what a traditional Thanksgiving or "wopila" is about. It is more than an annual tradition to gather and eat. In fact, it is done after weddings, funerals, births, sweat lodges, namings, significant events, and on the harvest moon.

In any event, I took some time to give thanks in my own way and I am thankful for:

the new friends I have made
the lessons I have learned
being able to hear children laugh and play despite the poverty and being surrounded by physical and human waste
the support of the Iraqi Police, Army, and even most of the Iraqi people the support of friends and family at home
coming home in one piece
living in a country where we can vote without having to pass through checkpoints manned with machine guns

Things Are Getting Muddy

2005-11-10T22:00:00.000+03:00

(Written 11.10.2005, posted 12.12.2005)

The change in weather has brought damp days and rain. We re-tarped our tents just in time for some rain, yet there were still puddles in our tents. The mornings are damp and the fine sandy "moon dust" just cakes to our boots in the morning and gets tracked inside our tents.

The weather is not the only thing getting muddy. With such little time left, the soldiers seem to not care about some things. In some ways it is good; they don't mind some of the mundane or arduous details around the camp because in a few weeks, it won't matter when we are all headed home. Other things, like paying attention and having the right gear on patrol, must continue to be enforced. Supplies are running low and we are not getting any mail. This has also been a bittersweet reminder of our pending rotation.

Then there are those people who realize this is the last chance to accomplish or try certain things, either physically or morally dangerous. Most people are content with just going home with their appendages intact, and others want medals, badges, or other ways to prove their combat experiences. Everyone is also burnt out about something: the food, the mundane cycle of meetings, patrols, even movie nights. Still, we go through periods of inactivity and more hostile activity, so you can never assume it is going to be a quiet night.

One evening, reports of flashes and bangs came from the main building complex on the camp. Everyone who had been on the camp when artillery, rockets, and mortars were incoming assumed it was the worst: insurgents anticipating troop rotations. I was busy trying to ascertain what was unfolding on the camp while listening to four radios. There were patrols reporting in from outside the camp, the higher unit trying to assess the situation, our unit's two-way radio, and the camp two-way radio. After about 20 minutes of chatter and units reporting in their accountability, it was discovered that two transformers on the camp blew up and there was no cause for alarm. It turned out to be a good "fire drill" for things to come.

Our anticipated rotation has prompted some improvements and changes on camp. From additional gravel to new shower units, we have made some necessary changes to leave the place in better condition than we found it. Still, were we not good enough to have these improvements sooner? The pumps on the shower units were not installed correctly for the first week or so with the new units. Perhaps it was a ploy to keep us on our toes. When we heard the pumps kick on, we had to do the "duck and dive" because the water would get either really hot or really cold until the pump cycled off.

We all had hoped for more improvements on our camp, like the dorm room-sized trailer homes (or cans as they are known on other camps) or even the Chow Hall.

Ramadan

2005-10-30T16:37:00.000+03:00

The five weeks back from leave have been full of people and equipment moves as well as getting ready for and executing the elections. I have been very busy and working straight out. Most of my time has been consumed by administrative business, packing, customs training, and running the command post during the elections. Surprisingly, the elections were tensely quiet. There has been more activity the week following the elections with suicide bombers, roadside bombs, and artillery missions. Still, I became settled in a routine after the elections dealing with small but important stuff. I finally had enough and was able to go on a peacekeeping patrol instead of a combat mission or a convoy run.

It was good to get out on patrol again and be around the people and not after a specific target. We did a "presence patrol" where we talk to people and gather information about how they feel and what their needs are. These "atmospherics" get rolled up and reported to the highest level. When it crosses the big desk, they make decisions on how long we should stay here and how many assets to use.

On my microscopic level, we are able to get out on the ground and talk to the people and learn. We spoke with some men who served in Saddam's army and now are unemployed. They were concerned why they have to be unemployed when there is litter in the streets and poor sanitation and electricity. They are willing to work and there is work to be done in the towns. The interpreter explained to us about the mistrust and low-level corruption. "It's like mafia," he said. In talking to some others citizens, we were told that we (US/Coalition Forces) are not needed here in this town; they trust their local security forces (the Iraqi police and National Guard), but they are happy to see us and see that we care.

We had the opportunity to learn about Ramadan firsthand as we stood in a street at a bakery. Some men were praying on their small blankets while we talked to a baker who was making some Ramadan treats to be served at sundown. He asked, "Why are you not fasting?" I told him it was not my turn and I suggested he show me. He laughed and handed me sweet but greasy fried dough-like bread.

It was my first time on a dismounted patrol where we walked for blocks away from the safety of our machine guns and seven-ton HMMWVs. It was not a big deal. I have complete confidence in the soldiers I work with. I was just thinking how far we are from the stereotypical Hollywood image of some kind of chiseled, rugged soldier. We are citizen soldiers, just average people doing the best we can. It is true that the insurgent cartography is a checkerboard mosaic spread out through and among the towns. We are trying to use the friendlier pockets as spheres of influence to sway public opinion on the less friendly areas. We know which areas are okay to walk in without the vehicle support and which areas not to stray too far along the back roads.

The end of Ramadan is referred to as the "nights of glory" when the Koran was revealed to Mohammad. As the end of October has been approaching, the gatherings of people at dusk have been growing. This time of religious renewal for Muslims is also a time when the suicide bombers are expected to attack, as if access to heaven is guaranteed after a suicide attack. We have been fortunate in our immediate area as the only thing these guys have been able to blow up are themselves. Some of our neighbors have not been so lucky.

After a successful day on patrol, we returned back to our camp for a company formation. It was rare to have all of us in one spot, considering our patrol schedules and having units detached to other camps. Some awards were given out, and I received some accolades; my boss is recommending me for promotion when we return. After several frustrating days, it was nice to have some rewards and see that my frustrations are not for nothing.

We have started our rainy season, and I hear it has been snowing at home. We have prepared for the wet season by re-tarping the tents, and extra gravel has been deposited around the living areas. Although the colder weather feels strange here, it comes with a sense of completion as if things are coming full circle. I am torn between keeping everyone in the game, and thinking of home and moving on to other adventures.

Surviving the Election

2005-10-18T09:26:00.000+03:00

The elections went of very well. After long days of patrolling during the curfew to ensure that no pre-placed bombs or weapons were brought close to the election sites, we were all tired, weary, and did not know what to expect with the elections. I sat in the command center most of the day trying to visualize what was going on out in the towns and track the progress on maps and on paper. It was a tense day hour-by-hour. It seemed too quiet. I was prepared for the worst and ready to respond to any attack. As the hours passed by, we were relieved that the day passed without incident. We even started joking on the radio at the end of the day when one of the platoons brought dinner out to one of our other platoons and they did a relief in place on the over watch position. I teased them over the radio about not rehearsing the tactical maneuvers necessary for the link up.

While the platoons were eating dinner together, gunfire erupted throughout the city. It was celebratory gunfire, indicating a successful election as the polling sites closed. Everyone was relieved. We all feel like the people here are making progress, and we are very proud of the Iraqi Security Forces and the people for supporting the elections. Overall there were about five attacks throughout the whole country and almost everyone voted.

The day after the elections, I went on patrol to talk to a few of the local police chiefs and assess the aftermath of the elections. Everyone in the area feels good about the elections and the way the Iraqi and American forces worked together. There is a mutual trust among the people, the police, and both nations' armies that was not present last year. The people were very happy and understanding about the curfews and the level of security we maintained. They knew it was for their safety and not to oppress them. We discussed with the Iraqis how the American media keeps portraying "American martial law" here. In fact, we have a good relationship with the Iraqi Army and Iraqi Police. Our goal is to train them to secure and run their own country. Over the year we have decreased our role and turned over more responsibility to them.

I am reminded of my anthropology classes at UConn where we discussed how America was settled. I was thinking about how it was many years between the Declaration of Independence and our own Constitution was accepted. There was even a time when the U.S. was governed under the Articles of Confederation previous to the Constitution. Here we have Iraq that has gone through many changes in four years. I have a sense that we are shepherding the people here to stand on their own. This shepherding business was tried with the Native Americans to help them manage their own welfare and natural resources; I only hope we are more thoughtful and sensitive this time.

There has been a chill in the air today. It is probably not that cold; it just feels unusual after the hot summer here. Of course, the change in temperature brought back the dust storms and we did not have air support from the helicopters today, so our missions and operational tempo decreased, as did our internet access. Unfortunately, all the bomb planters were out and the two days of quiet is starting to change as the patrols are beginning to hit the bombs again. We are not finished yet.

Pre-Election Pause

2005-10-13T09:57:00.000+03:00

It has been a busy two weeks. Even though the days are getting shorter, they seem longer. With less light during the day and the elections, our evening "fun runs" for stress release have significantly decreased.

It also feels like there is less time in the day to get things done. I am spending most of my time consumed by the end of tour requirements which encompasses the equipment accountability and transfers, medical evaluations, awards, performance evaluations, mandatory briefings, and scheduling all these events around operations. In addition, we have been supporting the elections with 10-12 hour security patrols around the clock, and we continue to do door-to-door checks on houses of known insurgents or places that would indicate an attack is planned. We are still hearing explosions through out the day, but luckily no major damage or injury. Everyone has been working long days and everyone seems tired and on edge. We all knew this was coming, but thankfully it will be one of our last major events.

I am pretty tired. I have been doing my best to encourage the guys and keep them in line so they do not get lazy or forgetful from being worn out. Everyone realizes we are close to the end, but we are still far from out of danger. I hope this next week goes by uneventfully. My faith in the media is still a bit shaken from last week's events, but I have nothing to say about that right now.

The internet has been sporadic here and I have had little time to check. I needed a bit of a break today. Also the postal people are shutting down normal operations on October 15th. It still seems a bit early, I would guess November 1st, but once again we will have to go for a few months with no mail. Still it means we are coming home so it is a good sign.

We are still diverting ourselves in our off time with what movies we have not shared yet, and most recently we have been watching TV series like CSI, Smallville, and Alias. I think we are spoiled by having the TV shows on DVD, and it will be weird to go home and watch commercials again or wait so long between episodes.

Other than that, there is not much to report. We are taking it hour by hour as we anticipate some reaction to the elections.

The Longest Day

2005-10-06T05:44:00.000+03:00

I woke up yesterday at about 5:30 in the morning, after an explosion or report of some roadside bomb in the area. I am getting used to hearing explosions around our camp, often followed by some gunfire. It is often conversation while we are brushing our teeth in the shower trailer. In any event, we sent out a patrol to assess the situation. I could not fall back to sleep so I started some of my morning chores and went to the normal meetings. The afternoon was more exciting because we spent the afternoon packing a shipping container with all our non-essential gear. Everything had to be clean, inspected, and sealed for shipping. Hopefully the container will meet us home. After that was done, I ran around camp helping the platoons get ready for a night mission. I did not really get a chance to eat lunch or dinner; I managed to squeeze in some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

We ended up conducting a raid in the wee hours of the morning. It was a little fireworks to kick off Ramadan, but the mission justified our reason for being here. There were reports of suspected terrorists visiting somewhere near our camp. As I have been busy trying to organize our movement back home, I was not sure what part I would play in the raid, but I ended up running the paddy wagon. It is kind of amazing, after trying to visualize the missions through the rehearsals, to actually see it come together in a good way. It actually went how Black Hawk Down should have gone. We only had a piece of the mission, but everyone did their part and it went well. After sneaking and waiting for hours, I hit the ground out of my truck to hear the early morning prayers broadcasting over megaphones. I approached the raid teams crunching through the sand and trash on the ground. Blindfolded and startled, our captives waited while we negotiated them one by one into the truck. I never really thought myself much of a police officer, and I thought about how dehumanizing it must be to stand almost naked amongst armored strangers yelling words they don't understand. Still, I am sure I gave them more consideration than they for their would-be victims.

After processing them into our "county lock up", I wandered back to our company area to make sure all the lights were off in the vehicles and make sure they were locked. Then I went to the operations center and convinced them to let me turn in my reports early so I could get some sleep. Now it is over 24 hours later and I am ready for a nap. At least it has been cooler here; the lows have been in the 70s and a high of only 95.

Once More into the Sand

2005-10-02T00:50:00.000+03:00

When I was growing up, my mother always had that "footprints" story on the wall somewhere in our house. While making my own footprints through the deserts of Iraq as the war unfolds around me, I recently had an opportunity to turn around and look back. After months of plodding along, I was amazed to find a marathon of footprints behind me. I am truly blessed to have the support of so many people. From my family and coworkers to my new friends and passers-by I have met in my travels, I am thankful for the generosity, time, and prayers.

I had a chance to go home for a couple weeks recently. I had an amazing time, from staring out the window at the trees to hanging out with my grandfather to visiting friends in Connecticut. Mom threw me a huge bash, and I visited with old friends and made some new ones. It was relaxing to fix things around the house and also very worthwhile to catch a Red Sox game and some shows around town. The weather was beautiful, too. Although the temperatures felt cooler to me, the humidity was something foreign and my body did not know whether to be hot or cold. (Meanwhile in Iraq, it has recently cooled off to 95 degrees, not 120.)

Still it went by all too fast. My anxiety about coming home after months of being away quickly abated and it seemed like I never left. Unfortunately it made it much harder to leave again. So close yet still many days to go. I found myself a bit angry and depressed. It is harder to leave the second time, because you know how much people care about you and you know what you will be going back to in the desert.

Although we are approaching the end of the tour, it will be the hardest part, I think. We have to keep the guys together as they become burned out, tired, or just sick of the same routine. I found my first days back were productive, getting everyone back in order and tightening up some of the procedures. Still, in my first twenty-four hours back, there were four attacks in the area. It sure is hard trying to get work done when there are explosions going on all day and reports of suspicious vehicles everywhere. Someone also made a great decision to release 1000 prisoners from Abu Gharib prison to celebrate Ramadan. They promised to be good.

We are working more with the local police and Iraqi Army at the camp we are at now. I still miss working with the kids, but hearing the appreciation from the police chiefs makes up for the attacks the other day. It is hard to remember we are doing the right thing with everything going on. The hurricanes affected us even over in Iraq, as many of the National Guardsmen with us are from the Mississippi area. Imagine going off to war and not having a house to come home to afterward.

I think poverty is universal; the flood victims in the south seem to have the same reactions and frustrations as the impoverished Iraqis here. It is another hard lesson for America and Americans. Almost half of the National Guard is "abroad" this year and are unable to do one of their peacetime missions. The government is still very reactive instead of proactive.

In my travels, I saw just how effective homeland security has become. I wondered why after spending nine months in the desert I had to disrobe, from my uniform even, and go through metal detectors after being on and off planes and helicopters for 36 hours. I thought, "I just wanted to see my family, if I am a terrorist then than there are bigger issues." I was patient; these guys are just doing their jobs. Still, we are so focused on terrorist attacks that we forget there are other national emergencies.

I do feel bad for the people in the south; it does not seem that the local governments had plans for dealing with this type of disaster and people did not want to evacuate when they were told to leave. I still feel funny about having troops come home from shooting insurgents in Iraq and have to police other Americans, especially when the Americans are shooting at the police and military. The one good thing about America is we can all rally around each other despite our diverse backgrounds. That is one thing I wish the Iraqi people can learn from us. There are so many ways to segregate the Iraqi people. Sunni/Shia, tribal factions, political factions, and even the non-Muslim Arabs who live here.

I read in the papers about the anti-war protestors and the anti-anti-war protestors. I am thankful that both groups show tremendous support foe the troops. The bottom line is we are here and we need to finish the job or everyone who died, died for nothing. The Bush Administration may or may not have handled things correctly, Saddam may or may not have been another Hitler, but it is true this is not another Vietnam and should not be considered that. We are not fighting an organized army. We are fighting pockets of disenfranchised people. Some lost power when Saddam was removed, some lost jobs at bomb making factories when Saddam was removed, but these people were rapping their own country. There are lavish palaces in Baghdad while the children sit in a ruined building for school in between a cesspool and a landfill.

We have made a tremendous difference here, but the cost has been high in dollars, time, and lives. This is not a Vietnam; I see it more like Germany after World War II. Whether Bush chose to invade Iraq for personal reasons I don't care to speculate. Seeing it from the inside, we have a foothold closer to Syria, Palestine, and North Korea. Meanwhile, our presence in Europe is decreasing. We are doing good things here to better the Iraqi people and their outlook on Americans and also to keep terrorism out of the States.

So once more into the beach ... I mean breach I go.

Almost September

2005-08-30T23:55:00.000+04:00

You might die trying

To change the world, your start with one step
However small, the first step is hardest of all
Once you get your gate, you'll be walking tall
You said you never did...
Cuz you might die trying...

If you give, you begin to live...
You get the world, but you might die trying.

Dave Matthews, smart man.

Things continue to be busy and snowball. My boss is back. Not only did I have to catch him up on all the changes, attacks, and incidents in his absence, but I was also tasked with a big responsibility. We are starting to plan now for the movement back home for good. I understand why we are starting the plan now, since I have hit many obstacles in the week. We have people and equipment tasked out between three camps, and in the end, it all has to get put back where it belongs. Unfortunately, our near-sighted brigade is not seeing past Mississippi where they belong. They keep forgetting that we have another 1,600 or so miles to go back to Yankee territory. I have been trying to play nice and I have grown some fortitude when talking to senior officers about my dilemmas. Unfortunately, I have had many wakeful nights the last two weeks. Thoughts of home and the journey still ahead to get there fill my head with dreams and hopes of things to come.

We also have Katrina acting up in the Southern U.S. Realizing many of the families of the deployed soldiers here live in the areas that are now flooded, there is talk of emergency leaves flooding our units. It will affect the focus and morale as well as those of us expecting to get leave.

The Iraqis still have not reached their referendum deadlines for the constitution, which plays a big part in our security and operational timeline. We are getting pretty adept at distinguishing outgoing mortar fire, artillery, and air strikes when compared to the roadside bombs and incoming mortars.

I had the opportunity to go to Baghdad last weekend. I went there primarily to see how we are resupplied; however, it was also an opportunity to see Baghdad. We drove near the Baghdad International Airport and arrived at the camp complex that surrounds manmade lakes speckled with Saddam's old palaces. (We are actually located at a Forward Operating Base which has many fewer amenities than an actual camp, like laundry service, catered dining facility, Post Exchange, et cetera. Our camp is about a 1-star compared to the 5-star camp in Baghdad.) The problem with going to Baghdad is the number of attacks on the roads coming and going. Right now, the roads there are closed. When I went, things were uneventful and quiet. It must be the number of people praying for me. It was a good diversion to have a change of pace for the day. I was able to eat a few good meals and relax. The problem is the times we had to travel in and our were outside my sleeping schedule, and since I have not been sleeping well, I returned to our camp with a terrible headache. Then it was back to the daily routine the next day.

This week continues to be challenging. Amidst constantly changing and ever-present threats from the enemy and fighting to make sure my company is represented among the other units, one of my friends was killed recently. I have not known him but for the two months we spent here. He was not a member of my unit, but someone who I sat with and joked with at meetings. He was one of the guys here who went out of his way to make sure we Yankees felt welcomed. He died doing his job, trying to improve the conditions here, trying to make things better for the Iraqis. As sad as we were today, everyone's heads low, we still had to keep on going throughout the day. There were still missions to run.

It is hard to believe it is almost September. I was walking across the camp today thinking to myself, It is nice that it is finally getting cooler. When I looked at the thermometer after lunch, it was still reading 110. We are also catching ourselves telling "war stories" from last winter and spring. We were retelling the camel spider story and the time there were 75 of us stuck in a 50-man tent in the middle of a deluge in Kuwait. Still, we have many days to go and I have mixed feelings about the stories that are yet to come.

It's Been a While

2005-08-19T17:47:00.000+04:00

It has been a busy three weeks and I have not had a moment to sit and compose my thoughts. Amongst other distractions, I am covering for my boss who is on leave, and since we are so busy I have opted to do the lion's share of the work to give the other guys who are patrolling more frequently a chance to rest. My sleep cycle has been off and the heat continues to be relentless. There is a standing joke when we get our weather reports that "it will cool off soon." The predictions are usually between 111-115 degrees, but every time I pass by the thermometer it is pegged out. Although, I am busy on the camp coordinating missions with the other units and keeping the guys informed, I am looking forward to going out a little more. Then again, things outside the camp have not been nice.

Better than the Sopranos

It is true that real life is better than fiction. We are supposed to be training the Iraqi Army and Iraqi police to run their own country, yet there is still so much leftover corruption, distrust, and power issues. The Army and the police have two separate functions and have to work together in any country. But these guys are having issues. A power struggle erupted over here and almost threatened the security of the elections in our area—just because one soldier thought he was better than a policeman. It erupted like a Shakespearean feud. I fear as the elections draw near there will be even more activity, both political and tactical.

We have already been exposed to various forms of attacks. We had our first bunker drill. It felt like a kindergarten fire drill. We were teaching a class on artillery when we heard some explosions that were not the familiar overpressure of outgoing artillery. We all looked at each other and a radio call was given, "incoming." Everyone grabbed their armor and helmet and marched to the bunker. I remembered to grab a radio so we could monitor the aftermath. As we confirmed our accountability, reports came in indicating it was not an artillery attack but a suicide bomber who drove a vehicle at a checkpoint. We have seen our fair share of roadside bombs the last few weeks.

Sometimes I don't blame the Iraqis. They have many things working against them: years of oppression, tyranny, and poverty under Saddam, coupled with all the different factions of which their society is comprised. There is the Sunni/Shia division, various tribal groups, Ba'ath Party, SCIRI Party, etc. There are so many ways these people can be divided, and it is no surprise reading the history of this area being conquered. Still it is hard not to harbor some anger after being attacked. I understand more what Vietnam must have been like and the issues movies like Good Morning Vietnam were trying to address. I also see what is happening between Israel and Palestine.

It still bothers me how the American media portrays the war. Everyone hears about when the soldiers are attacked or some big name is captured or killed. No one hears about the schools, water treatment facilities, power plants, and hospitals we visit. Nor do they hear about the thousands of rounds of ammunition we are capturing and destroying on a daily basis, or hours of grueling meetings where things must be carefully spoken twice, once in English and once in Arabic, so both parties understand the intent and outcome.

Status Upgrade

Everyone at home still continues to support me. I receive many packages in the mail and probably keep less than one-third of it. Not that it is stuff I do not want, but I enjoy sharing all my goodies with the guys and sending it out to the communities. Usually if someone needs razors, shaving cream, gum, or some snacks they say, "Go see Scott!" My status has been upgraded from the "Wal-Mart of Iraq" to the "Costco of Iraq".

How Am I?

I have been trying to do the best I can with what I have to work with, and it has been tough. I don't think I am doing anything special, just taking care of the little things so they do not affect the bigger things. Sometimes I forget myself. We do have DVDs and satellite TV, but after a while it gets routine: "What haven't we watched yet?" We only have a handful of TV stations to choose from. We do get some European news, a few movie channels with Arabic subtitles, and Fashion TV for some eye candy. We had to take a break from the Fashion TV, since we were starting to remember the designers' names as well as the models'.

In addition to not sleeping well, I am also bored with herding through the chow hall and eating because we have to, not because we want to. I do appreciate the goodies that I have been getting, but I am trying to not make a habit of not going to the chow hall and only eating cereal and granola bars.

I am still finding time to enjoy the music on my MP3 and do a little tai chi and salsa. I tried making some sun tea a few weeks ago. It worked pretty well leaving tea bags in a water bottle on one of the bunkers. Then I remembered hearing a study about heating up plastic and getting the free radicals in the food or water. We have also been able to run on the camp to relieve stress and keep in shape. Aside from the restrictions on running in the middle of the day (when we would burn more brain cells than calories) and the potential for "rocket man" to send us an airborne present, running at dusk along the river is nice. I saw some birds other than the sparrows in the trees that I wanted to get a picture of, but I did not have my camera when I was running.

I also had a bad week, being frustrated with showering and changing clothes, because twenty minutes after fighting with the broken showerheads or figuring out how to get soap off your body when the water runs out, we end up just as sweaty as before the shower. We also have a laundry unit here that washes our clothes. It is a Reserve or National Guard unit from Puerto Rico. Somehow the term "Puerto Rican laundry" is the name that has been given to the facility. It sounds like a racial slur, but no one complains. Unfortunately, they only allow pick-ups and drop-offs during the busiest time of my day when I am either collecting information from or giving information to my company.

I am still glad to be part of this experience. It does not feel like a stalemate war like Vietnam was painted to be. From here, it feels like a nation going through growing pains while the rest of the world watches every step the U.S. soldiers make. I have accepted that many insurgents are people upset by the loss of power they had with Saddam or are Muslims afraid of "American Influence" leading to a weaker Muslim state. It has been tough many times. Looking back at the months that have passed, I have had many memories and accomplishments and feel that overall I have done more good. Still, I often think of my former life back home and look forward to returning home and being with friends and loved ones.

New Home

2005-07-28T13:26:00.000+04:00

Sorry I have not written in a while. The move to the new camp and then getting settled took a lot out of me. I just haven't had the energy or time to sit down and write a good letter. We have seen more in two weeks here than in several months where we were before. Although it is more dangerous and I miss visiting the children, this feels more like what you would expect from war. We have been marginally involved in several missions since we are still learning the area, but nevertheless we have come closer to the reality of "kill or be killed." I have not personally been on a combat patrol yet, as I have had other responsibilities that required me to stay at the camp. I have been given the opportunity to go to an embassy nearby and will go to Baghdad in a few weeks.

The camp we are living is an afterthought addition to a decaying industrial complex. It is still fully functional, and there are local nationals (Iraqis) working here. There were also mortar attacks in the spring. The result leaves us a little uneasy. We got used to living on a camp that was build as a stand-alone camp where the terrain made us feel like the camp was an M&M on a ping pong table. We could see the desert in every direction and security was easy. Here, the scenery is very busy. We have garbage and scrap metal piles in some areas, steel tanks, pipes and electrical towers in another area. Various buildings are scattered around the camp and we also sit right on the river so there is a nice view and vegetation.

We also have an artillery battery here. The guns fire unexpectedly as they train or respond to real missions. Being tankers and used to firing big guns, we understand what the overpressure created from the moving air as the projectile leaves the barrel feels like. With that knowledge, we can tell that it is outgoing rounds and not incoming rounds. Still, in the back of your head you have to remember at all times where you are and where the closest bunker is located.

The food here is also not as nice as our previous location. It is one of the few camps in the country that still uses military cooks and not a contract dining facility. The chow hall is very hot; you know you are done eating when there is more of your sweat in the plate than your food.

Thinking of the Kids

On one of my last patrols before we left the old camp, we were out inspecting the conditions of the schools in the area. We had to dismount our vehicles and walk around in the streets. The kids were out of school, and everywhere we went we had a little entourage of local kids following us. They were very curious and followed us around the streets and as we walked. We were trying to communicate and I picked up a few more words for my vocabulary. The catch is we were still on a dismounted patrol walking out of site from our vehicles. We would stop and peek around corners and look on rooftops and in windows while we were walking around. I stopped on one corner of the school yard wall to peer around the corner before exposing myself, and I felt a loud thump on my armor plate. To myself I was thinking, "If that was a bullet, shouldn't I be knocked over or something?" Then I realized what happened and quickly spun around to see one of the boys rubbing his head. I broke stride and stopped short to peek, and the boy behind me kept going right into my back. I laughed and went to rub his head, but he ducked down like a scared cat. I pulled some crackers out of my pocket and gave them to him. He smiled.

I Finally Made It Out

This week I was able to go on a patrol. It was good to get off the camp and get out of the daily routine. The days go by faster on patrol. I insisted on sitting in the turret of the hummvee this time. I really wanted to get some fresh air and see the area. We are close to the Euphrates River and its tributaries, so there are more palm trees and greenery than where we were before. There is still the same degree of poverty here. I was talking to some of the civil affairs guys we were escorting about the conditions in Iraq. We both agreed that Saddam was too busy spending money on palaces and weapons, and he let the communities fall apart. Everywhere we go the schools are falling apart. There is inadequate lighting and electricity, small classrooms that are overcrowded, and the foundations are all cracked and crumbling. We also had the opportunity to stop by an embassy guarded by soldiers from El Salvador, and we ran into soldiers from Poland. We were going to go to the ruins of Babylon, but they were closed for some undisclosed reason.

In the News

The area we are in made the news. There was a bombing directed at a mosque in one of the closest towns to our camp. There was speculation that it was an Al Qaeda-related attack, but the insurgents were trying to blame us to discourage relations between us and the local communities. There are lots of political things going on here. The struggle between Sunni and Shia, local politics, and all the corruption makes me think of the mob. The gas prices are just as high over here, but the local police decided they were not being paid enough so they unionized and took over the gas station and at least doubled the price.

Here we have the opportunity to see the full spectrum of modern war. In one area, teams are out rebuilding schools while others teams are meeting with mayors and governors. Meanwhile down the road, American and Iraqi soldiers are chasing and catching these bomb makers. Some of these insurgents get to live and see the detainee center and some do not. We are still pretty new to the area so we have not yet been directly involved with the more aggressive patrols, but I have listened to the pursuit on the tactical radios and we have seen the aftermath of the bombings and the pursuits.

The nights have been in the 80s and 90s this week. While the temperature is still 120-140 during the day, we are finding we get chills at night. I wonder how it will feel coming home to winter in New England. I am however, looking forward to coming home for good. I have decided a bad day at home is still better than a good day here. I am no longer worried about coming home. I am sure things will work out and everything will be OK.

We have started to get mail regularly again. As always, I am grateful for the friends and family I have. I always seem to get the right things at the right time, when I am feeling down or have been thinking about someone. Thank you.

George Foreman and Candy Canes

2005-07-09T17:24:00.000+04:00

We were hanging around the other day talking about how things are out here. We were joking about the George Foreman grill. You know, two metal plates sandwiching meat while all the juices run down the plates. Except in our cases the body armor is like wearing a George Foreman grill. Everyday the sweat just pours down our torsos. You would be surprised by the puddles we leave behind when we get out of our vehicles after patrol.

After another long day, I came back to my tent and sat down to unwind. As I took off my boots and looked at my feet, the first thing that popped into my head was candy canes. My toes looked like red peppermint candy canes from the sweat and irritation. I have been using lotion, foot spray, and powder regularly, but I am still putting lots of miles on my feet.

Camp life is really not that bad. We have three hot meals a day that we do not have to cook or wash dishes after. We do have showers and electricity in our areas. Hot water is not a problem anymore. We have no commute to work. We have a laundry service with 24-hour turnaround, and we don't worry about picking out what clothes to wear. The camp has a softball field, basketball court, and recreation tent with foosball and TVs. We also have satellite phones and internet. Bills are also not much of a worry, as we have very few options for spending money.

So what is the big deal? There is something missing. Although there are friendships and loyalties in the company and the camp, it is not really family or "someone special." We entertain ourselves by watching movies, playing games, and training when we are not on missions. But I can not escape the fact that I am lonely and feel somewhat trapped. We do not have the same freedoms here on camp. When leaving camp, we have to file an itinerary and understand the risks out there. Staying on camp gets boring after awhile. It is no wonder that animals do not live as long in captivity no matter how fancy the zoo. Even they understand something is missing.

Outside the Wire

Outside camp there are always things going on and changing. We have had more opportunities to touch the lives of the children as we bring food and toys. It is always bittersweet to see such poverty—looking at the joy in the children's eyes when we give them something, and then moments later they are still begging for more while they hide and horde their other gifts.

We also face an adaptive enemy. They stick with the same techniques until they stop working, and then they try something new. It is amazing how many ways there are to make bombs out of common things, never mind the continually surfacing "forgotten munitions" that the insurgents find, build, or the local farmer "finds" in his backyard while preparing his crops. It is impressive to see the changes in the neighborhoods. Some areas had electricity for only two hours a day, there were no street lights, and there were rotting trash and carcasses everywhere. Now they are trying to pave the roads, there are functioning dumpsters, and street lights illuminate the neighborhoods all night.

It is interesting to overhear meetings and discussions about where to spend money to improve the towns. How do you choose what is more important: sanitation, emergency services, or public education? Another complication is we do not want to make the decision; we want the Iraqi government to decide while we just facilitate.

Unfortunately as happy as they are for our help and money, there are still people here that do not want us around and want to harm us. There are those who say the insurgents are here because the military is here. Others say it is Arabs from other Islamic countries causing the trouble because they are afraid the Muslim community will be weakened by American influence. I feel there is a delicate balance rebuilding this country. If we do not do it right, we could end up with a welfare state or the infrastructure could crumble like a house of cards. Either way, we will be blamed. Still, I must remain optimistic and focus on the little bits of good that I can do and not be overwhelmed by the global politics.

Ajax and Achilles Revisited

I still think about the vase we studied in art history of Ajax and Achilles playing chess in a tent while the Trojan War raged around them. Here are some pictures of our moments of fun. I have also had some vivid dreams the last few weeks. I mostly dream of coming home and reuniting with friends and family or even sitting on my porch without any shoes on. Still, I think I have a difficult journey until then as things are always changing.

Firefight

2005-06-21T19:15:00.000+04:00

There we were on a typical day at camp. As usual, the power had been fluctuating because even the generators could not take the heat. After hearing some curious popping sounds, we sprang to action upon realizing one of our neighboring tents had caught on fire.

My able-bodied armor crewmen jumped to action, and we began surrounding the already engulfed tent with clouds of Halon. Despite our best efforts, the 140 degree air temperature and persistent wind did not act in our favor. It was a tug of war stand-off between us and the fire. As we exhausted the dry chemical bottles and almost put out the fire, the wind would resuscitate the smoldering canvas. Runners were dispatched to find more bottles, and the company first sergeant and I quickly realized this was only a containment job, not an extinguishing job. I quickly called on the radio to the operations center to alert them and dispatch more help and a water truck.

Luckily it was just a tent for transient convoys and was unoccupied at the time. Our biggest concern was not letting the fire spread to adjacent tents with gear and people inside. After a good workout, we spent the rest of the afternoon finding shade since they had to shut off the generator to clean up the mess.

Happy First Day of Summer

One of my jobs is to report the weather to the guys in the company. It sometimes seems trivial because it is always hot, dusty, and dry. However, changes must be reported like an extremely hot day or increased sand storms. Also, things like the amount of moon light or sunrise and sunset affect our missions. We found out the other day that the official thermometer stops reading at 118 degrees. I took a little heat for that, since everyone asks me, "How hot is it today?" Well, I had been reporting 118 degrees when it was actually closer to 138-140 degrees, already.

In case you are wondering what it is like over here, try this at home. First, get a cupful of fine dirt or sand. Find a nice cotton long-sleeve shirt and pants and throw the in the clothes dryer on high heat. Then run into the bathroom and put the cup of sand on the sink. Jump in the shower with the water as hot as you can barely stand. Then without drying off, run to the dryer and put the clothes on right out of the dryer (yes, over your wet body). Run back to the bathroom and turn the hair dryer on full hot blast and hold it a half inch from your nose. Throw the sand in the hot air. Repeat this several times and you're in Iraq. (Athlete's foot and jock itch not included.)

Poetry or Prose?

I have received many comments and praises on my writing. I had initially intended my writing to be a way to vent, express my feelings, and capture my experiences here. I also wanted to have a way to keep in touch with my family and co-workers back home. What started as a small email list grew to a website, and I have received emails and letters from Iraq to Kuwait to Europe and even back in the states.

My writings have even made their way back to the guys in my company. I had mixed feelings about this at first. Not that I am keeping anything or writing about them specifically, but I never envisioned my popularity. I saw this as more of a personal log and a way of keeping in touch with people I care about back home.

In any event, several people have commented about my writing a book, and I am flattered. Most recently, the guys were teasing me about doing a movie deal. We have not decided if it is an action film or comedy, but casting has gone out for Bruce Willis, Danny DeVito and Jack Nicholson as some of the main characters. To play me, the guys have suggested "the Rock." I think I had better hit the Gym.

If you like my prose how about a change this time?

The Lonely Path

I found myself in the desert.
Alone, I stand bisected between a blue sky and tan sand.
With feet planted firmly my gaze upward and alert
Once again contemplating the measure of a man.

Far away from home dust sweeps across my face.
fettered in modern armor and sweat lingers on my brow.
Surveying a barren horizon, salt on my lips I taste.
Looking outward, but meditating inward, "Who am I now?"

Fighting a war of the flesh, mind, heart and spirit,
On a quest to become whole and holy.
Looking for balance and reason I discover
In the eyes of the children are lessons of mortality and humanity.

Watching war from the inside on the news,
learning first hand about other people's views,
and observing how politics can abuse.
These lessons to my own character, I have fused.

Unyielding devotion to my comrades in arms
To see them through the course.
With my best effort I have done my part.
And hope to leave this place better than worse.

Alone in the desert, I stand
While loved ones back home send me comfort
I am but one small humble grain of sand
Still, I found myself in the desert.

—April 23, 2005 from Iraq

Third Time Is a Charm

2005-06-06T20:43:00.000+04:00

My third time in a police car, I was able to drive. We received a bunch of vehicles for the Iraqi Security Forces that we had to deliver. We had close to 30 vehicles, not including our HMMWVs and truck, to bring back all the drivers. It took most of our company. The convoy was impressive, and although we could not use the sirens or lights, we still got quite the reception from the locals. It must have been a sight seeing all the Iraqi police cars being escorted by military vehicles; on top of that, it was the soldiers driving. At first the kids were not sure about waving. Then they laughed.

Of course there was a catch—I ended up getting tied up handing out keys and lining up vehicles, and I did not realize the last car left for me was a "hooptie" police car with manual transmission. Being from Boston with traffic, I had not seen the benefit of having a manual transmission, and my total stick time equated to about 30 minutes in a minivan in Kuwait, about an hour in South Dakota, and a couple hours in my high school parking lot with my then little brothers getting seasick in the back seat.

So here I am in a police car, in Iraq, the 32nd vehicle in a 34 vehicle convoy, locked and loaded for battle and trying to "look good in front of the guys." Don't get me wrong, I paid attention in physics and shop class, I just never developed the patience for the clutch pedal. Aside from stalling once when the convoy bottlenecked in the entrance to our destination and pulling a NASCAR maneuver on a turn where we leapfrogged the "gun trucks" to block traffic, I think I did well.

Power

Life is not too bad on the camp. We have ten man tents with power running in them and most of the comforts of home, except the bathrooms. (I heard a rumor there are work orders to put seat belts in the porta johns. Something about sweating so much at 160 degrees that you slide right off the seat.) Our tents also have fans and A/C. The problem is that the canvas radiates heat. Our electricity is powered by diesel generators that are frequently breaking.

So let's do the math. It is 140 degrees outside, diesel burns at 800+ degrees, and the electrical load on the generators all cause the generators to overheat and shut down. When? The middle of the day, of course. Solution: Don't run the A/C during the day, according to the officers running the camp. That might make sense if you work in an office that is not your tent from 9-5 and can come back to your tent and cool it off in the evening; however, my tent is the office, and we do patrols at all hours of the day and some times sleep during the day. It is amazing how fast your body can produce sweat going from 140 outside to 160 inside a tent. Instant saturation. We are working on a few solutions, like multiple generators that cycle on and off to allow cooling. There are also 18-wheel trailers that are supposed to be full of ice for us to keep water cold on patrol. We were joking about it today: "If the Vermonters disappear, just look in the ice trailers; we will be in there playing cards in T-shirts."

Saddam's Picture

I guess Saddam made the paper recently. Someone took photos of him bathing in his underwear and published a story about it. Well as I mentioned before, everything is related. I am sure the intent of the photos is to contrast Saddam as a dictator to his life now. Unfortunately, many Muslims see this as Americans humiliating Muslims. In addition, the false reports of mishandling of the Qu'ran in Guantanamo and the aftermath of the Abu Ghraib prison abuses all affect us here. We spend hours trying to gain trust and support of the local people, who have been under a corrupt dictatorship and told lies about Americans, all to be undone by some media spin. I enjoyed having the media representation here last month where we were able to give our personal account of what is going on, but sometimes I question the motivations of the media and hope they understand the impact.

Difficult Negotiations

I had very difficult and stressful negotiations the other day. I was trying to work a few angles with the ladies. But I got the cold shoulder and was worn down by relentless requests for goods. We were trying to negotiate the release of soccer balls and toys in exchange for getting the kids to eat granola bars and brush their teeth.

Although it is the most exciting and rewarding thing we do here, it is also one of the more challenging things, trying to constructively hand out toys, food, water, and supplies to the kids in town. It is hard to not get caught up in the moment and lose sight of our security, trying to balance talking (or trying to talk) with the kids, taking pictures, ensuring security, and keeping the kids from climbing in and around the vehicles. It is also sad—the more we give out things, the more they expect us to give things. We have even had boys throw rocks at us when we ran out of things to give. The kids have caused fights over balls, and other kids will run and hide things and come back empty-handed as if they never got anything.

I feel for these people living in such poverty, corruption, and oppression, and now in a period of instability. I wonder if the habits of the kids extend to the adults. I fear we may be creating a welfare state and end up throwing more and more money into the country, only for them to expect more and more. We are trying to reconstruct Iraq, maintain cultural sensitivity, and minimize use of force and collateral damage—all under the watchful eye of the media. Unfortunately, if we do the right thing, our presence here goes unnoticed, but if we do the wrong thing, then we end up an international incident via a court martial for a "bad shoot" or via another improvised explosive statistic.

Windows

The view here is amazing. The way the tan sand and blue sky contrast each other and being able to see for miles puts things in proportion, reminding me how small we are and how big the earth is. There are no windows to look through. Open air outside and no windows in the tents. Sometimes I lose track of time while I am working in my tent or when we watch movies. Walking out of the tent and stepping back into reality hits you just as bad as the heat. Having to remember where we are and why we are here. I lose track of time because it is the same thing everyday. We may run different missions at different times, but the task and purpose are the same. The days and weeks run together. I find myself intentionally finding ways to break up the day or week by doing something different or changing eating habits, going on more missions than usual, or not sleeping the same hours.

In fact, the only window I have to look through is on my laptop. My "digital looking glass" helps keep me in touch with the "real world." I am really not fond of the phones here, maybe because of the satellite delay, but I think I am afraid someone will hear loneliness in my voice. So I rely on my laptop to stay connected. Listening to music, watching movies, or even writing email and stories helps pass the time. Being able to reach across time and space instantly through email and instant message reminds me of how small the earth is, going "through the looking glass" to touch people back home.

Thank You, Again

2005-06-01T14:25:00.000+04:00

It has been a busy week. I am hoping we will soon move back south to Kuwait. Unfortunately we still have to make it through summer. I turned my calendar today and laughed. The first day of summer is the 21st, yet it has been consistently between 110 and 130 the last few weeks. It cools off to about 85-90 at night. I am working on another update with some more stories.

However, I am really writing today to thank everyone again for sending me packages and letters. I consistently get between two and several packages in the mail when it is delivered. Although the guys tease me, I let them watch me go through the packages and I make three piles: one pile for the kids in town, one pile for the soldiers in my unit and the camp, and a smaller pile for myself. Everyone's generosity is a reflection on my character and I appreciate it. They are calling me the "Iraqi Wal-Mart." My tent is beginning to look like a CVS or Walgreens. I have a section of toiletries and personal needs, a section of goodies, and a section of toys and school supplies for the kids. I am due for another trip in my camp golf cart to drop off stuff, and we are planning another trip in town to visit the kids.

Things in our area have been thus far relatively quiet. However, there are three major operations going on up north: Matador, New Market, and Lightning. Although these three are publicized in the news, there are other smaller operations going on and one of our concerns is the activity in the north pushing the insurgents farther south. In turn, we have been pushing out guys to get back to basics and continue their training. We also expect longer and more frequent patrols to monitor changes in the area as well as prepare for the elections here in September.

Once again, I thank you all. I could not do this without you.

A Few New Pictures

2005-05-25T07:08:00.000+04:00

Summer Time

2005-05-17T22:31:00.000+04:00

Summer is right around the corner. It is time for cookouts, barbecues, and picnics. Ever had one of those baked potatoes that you throw some butter and seasoning in, wrap in foil and cook, on the grill? Well...most days I feel like that potato, wrapped in my body armor and sitting in the HMMWV.

Critters

I have been on a quest to capture in person or on film some of the critters we have around here. I'd like to thank Alison for that. After sitting for hours looking at the back yard wildlife of New England, I thought I would return the favor.

I am still trying to catch a picture of a beautiful teal bird I saw the other day, but I have managed to get some of the creepy crawlies around here. We managed to lasso a Jurassic-looking lizard with a small green head and a tan/yellow body. These little guys are running all over the place. Of course, there is our friend the camel spider who I guess is not really a true spider, non-poisonous, and does not get three feet in length. With those fangs and hairy legs, I'd prefer they stay outside the tent while I am sleeping. I also found an earwig pincher bug almost three inches long, another thing to worry about when you are sleeping. I also found a scarab beetle and a gecko-looking guy.

Salsa Night

I am very sad to report that our salsa instructors have been relocated to another camp. I don't know if it bothers me more not having something to look forward to to break up my week, or going to salsa night and not having a partner. I guess the odds are not in my favor.

Dualism

As a traditional guardsman, I don't think many people understand that we have to live dual lives and the consequences. Going from a normal work week to drill weekend is not so bad, but coming back to civilian life is a bit more difficult, especially while maintaining the same standards as active duty, full-time military. The slogan is one weekend a month and two weeks a year, but I lost track of the lunch hours I had given up on my civilian job to prepare for weekends or the hours driving to and from training meetings or the extra hours at work to squeeze in a workout.

Now on active duty, we see more dualism. We still have lives and jobs to go back to and no matter how many times we (try to) call home or read e-mails, somehow our brains process things still being the same as the day we left. As if we were in a time machine or the rest of our world" is in suspended animation.

As we get closer to the halfway point, I find my thoughts are on coming home and being able to reintegrate into my former life as a civilian. I had to hand off responsibilities for paying bills and my share of assignments at work. Although it is a trade-off being a single soldier where I won't have to worry about fitting back in with immediate family or head of household or parenting, I worry about fitting back in with friends and co-workers. I also wonder how much of me has changed, and I am wondering what I will do when I don't have to work 16-20 hour days.

There is another duality here. Some days we find ourselves fighting the "kinetic war" where we have been sent to guard equipment in the open desert for extended periods of time, prepare to defend the camp against local tensions, or travel on convoys around our sector. Other days we are fighting the "popular war" talking to people downtown, handing out goodies to the kids, or assessing the conditions of the roads and schools, where we are trying to rebuild and stabilize the infrastructure of the area. Although both missions are important, it is hard to make that switch on our posture and aggression level. Considering we could get hurt in either situation, it takes attentive soldiers and leaders to know the difference. If we are too aggressive on our "peacekeeping" missions, we could upset the local sentiment and our support will backslide. If we are too complacent on our tactical missions, an attack would be devastating. The heat factor with the weather does not help; taking off our helmets or body armor for a minute to get some fresh air or when fighting the sleep monster would be detrimental not only to individuals but to the whole group.

WCAX TV Spots

2005-05-16T19:20:00.000+04:00

WCAX (channel 3 in Burlington, Vermont) will be doing a story on us this week on TV. We also did 10 sec. greeting that should be airing around the same time. So keep your VCRs and DVRs ready.

I should have another update out soon. It has been a long hot couple of weeks.

Police Escort

2005-05-02T12:18:00.000+04:00

When I was young, I never thought I would ever find myself in the back of a police car, much less a police car in Iraq. This was the second time I had to sit in the back of a cruiser. I remember my mother's face the first time I climbed out of the back seat. I had hydroplaned off the road shortly after receiving my license and got the family car stuck in a small ditch off the side of the road. Much to her relief, a helpful policeman just offered me a ride home to get some recovery tools.

I can only imagine what my mom is thinking this time. As it turns out, we have been working with the Iraqi police to clean up the streets for the kids. There are much better things to play with than leftover ammunition and projectiles. I volunteered to be the security and middleman between the police chief, the interpreter, and our patrol. So I found myself sitting in the back of the cruiser in my body armor and Kevlar. There was not much room to move, nor was there much small talk. I have only mastered a handful of words in Arabic. We ended up discussing the sandstorms and fleas.

Overall it was a good experience working with the police. I still feel a sense of their residual distrust and uncertainty, as they were reluctant to divulge certain details of their operations. I understand they want ownership of their district, which is good for us that they can be independent, but we just need to make sure we are leaving reliable people in charge that will take care of the people first and not themselves first.

Gifts from the Desert

The dry heat is not the only gift of the desert. The temperature change from day to night is extreme enough to cause great sand storms. I was able to catch one rolling in on my camera. I am not sure it will upload well. I thought the sand storm scenes in the Mummy or Hidalgo were a great special effect, until I stood in one.

It was eerie. It came from the west, a silent tan/orange cloud that was growing in size and momentum. The mass overtook the waning daylight so the ambient light was orangey and grey. The mass of dust seemed to be swallowing everything. Then the silence was broken by a sudden rush of wind. I thought it is best to seek shelter, yet in the two minutes I watched filming, I realized it was too late and made a mad dash for the tent. I was able to capture more footage of the storm from the shelter of the breezeway in the tent. The whole airspace above the earth was as if painted orange, except it was coarse like sand paper. It was like a gritty fog. Unfortunately my tent is not completely sealed, and the foot of my bed and some of my clothes and things were covered in a thick layer of fine sand. It took a few rounds with the broom and mop to restore the floor of my tent to pre-storm conditions.

The sand storm does well for getting rid of the flies that have been pestering us in the chow hall, portajohns, and while on patrol; however, the sandstorms bring fleas. I thought I was wearing my belt too tight and my hips were itchy, so I started to scratch. Later on in the shower I realized I had bumps on my belt line just forward of my iliac crests. The flies are also enjoying our arms from our elbows and wrists and especially below our inner biceps. I have been using bug spray and flea collars around my boots. Hopefully this will just be mildly uncomfortable and not aggravating. Looks like the only blood I will be able to give now will be to the sand fleas.

War Wounds

I think I may have my first battle scar. We went out to the range to reconfirm our weapons sights and to train on some mounted engagements. It is nice having ranges in the middle of the desert. There is plenty of maneuver space and nowhere to hide. We were conducting a simultaneous engagement with multiple weapons. The metal weapons already get hot enough from just sitting in the sun, so we must wear gloves. Moreover, the barrels become hotter while firing. I happened to be sitting in the right spot, and out of the corner of my eye I saw brass heading in my direction. Although with my cat-like reflexes I could have caught the brass, my body armor prevented me from reaching across far enough to cover my neck. Two rifle casings from a hot gun flopped in between my neck and my body armor, resulting in second degree burns. I am not sure if the blistering was assisted by the sun or the salt residue from my sweat rubbing against my clothes and skin. In any event, it is just another irritation that looks more like a hickie now. You know after five months, I think I would rather prefer having a hickie than being teased for having something that looks like a hickie.

Salt Lines

Speaking of sweat and salt, the arid desert and profuse sweating (and drinking water) cause our body salt to precipitate on our clothes. Even after taking a shower on the morning, putting on a clean uniform, and changing socks and t-shirt during the day, at the end of the day it feels like we have been wearing our clothes for a week. I find the patterns of salt lines on everyone's armpits, collars, and hats interesting. I wonder if you can read them the way you read palms or tea leaves. They probably just say, "Take a bath!"

Boots on the Ground

After five months, I finally got my second and third pair of boots. I have been wearing the same pair of Gore-Tex winter boots since we got here. It got to the point where I my feet would hurt for the first 45 minutes I had my boots on and I would have to change my socks a few times a day. In 100+ degrees, having summer boots and boots to swap out made huge difference.

Kevlar Samurai

We also received more upgrades to our body armor. They are pads for our armpits and kidneys worn under the vest and shoulder pads for outside the vest. It is interesting the cycles of history. In Roman and medieval times, armor was worn to protect the soldier, and with the advent of gunpowder even the horses were fitted with protective armor. Then in the time of Napoleon, the American civil war, and even the World Wars, armor was not widely used on the individual soldier. Now we are back in a period where body armor is required on the soldiers and the vehicles. With my helmet, vest, and crotch protector, I feel more like I am wearing samurai armor. Unfortunately, survivability and mobility are inversely proportional. The more crap we put on, the less we can move or want to move in the heat. It is not terrible, but it takes some time to break in and get used to before it becomes familiar and fluid. I think the tenants of Bushido have gone the way of the sword. Just a decorative conversation pieces more than a warrior ethos.

There is a distinct division between being a soldier and being a warrior. Although soldiering involves performing a job with a great deal of sacrifice, being a warrior really internalizes a commitment of mind, body, heart, and spirit. I really don't think many people really understand why we are here or why we want to or should be here. It's not really for the combat patch, medals, CCB/CIB, oil, economy, et cetera. We hear there are still people home protesting the war and voting at town meetings for us to come home. We are not fighting Iraqis. We are fighting corruption and fear. I have talked to several Iraqis at different occasions and in different positions of authority. They all say the insurgents are either non-Iraqi Muslims who fear democracy and American influence and think our presence here weakens the Muslim/tribal culture, or they are people who were in Saddam's back pocket and are upset because they no longer have power and riches. The Iraqis seem to want us here not to help rebuild and bring them out of poverty.

I wish the war protestors could see into the eyes of the children here. Don't just support the troops but support the people. After all, we are all related. Maybe the global economy has much to do with it and greed, abuse, and corruption cause ripples that affect people in another part of the world. For example, after World War I, an economic balance was established to help rebuild England, France, and Germany. It was American stock traders that upset this balance and the world; not just America experienced a depression in the 1930s. Hitler used this depression to gain popularity, and World War II ensued. Americans then did not want to get involved until Pearl Harbor.

Maybe I am an idealist. But I am here. I do not want to go home early because of the way people feel back home. I am not giving up my seat so someone can die in my place or absence. We have to finish what we start. Close the loop. Although I volunteered almost ten years ago, this is something that we are all told to prepare for. We do not get to pick the time, place, or circumstances; that is up to fate or whom you chose to pray to. I am here to do my job. In fact, it is not a job. I am here to make a difference. It may be to influence a handful of Iraqis and their children, so they do not grow up to hate Americans or become terrorists, or it may be to keep the guys in my unit alive. In any event this is my path, I have to do the best I can, but I could use some help along the way.

Living Conditions

2005-04-20T22:37:00.000+04:00

I have had some emails from home; 80 degrees feels like a cool day here. It has been in the 80s this week. It felt much better than last week, although we are still debating whether or not we broke 100. The biggest weather challenge this week has been the sand storms. Everyone is obligated to wear their eye protection now—even in camp, not just on patrols. I have had a tough time with bloody noses the last two days and have been using my eye drops regularly. When it was hot last week, we were commenting on the thought we still have about 40 degrees to go and we would be luck to see 80 degrees at night. When we were working on our vehicles, we put some nuts and bolts on the back of the vehicle and when I picked them up, I could not hold them, they were so hot. We were also talking about the portajohns again. One of the guys was joking, "Oh its great. You sweat so much in there it just pours off you and washes everything off your ass."

The flies are very aggressive here. Despite a series of doors, fans, and plastic curtains, the flies manage to harass us in the chow hall, and when we are working outside the flies have not problems getting on your face, lips, and ears. It started with the little black flies that get in your eyes and ears. Now we are up to the full grown dime-size flies.

We caught our first camel spider today. One of the guys came back from brushing his teeth and said, "I think I saw a scorpion." So we went flying back out to check it out. We used the big guy as bait once we realized these spiders try to hide in your shadow. I snuck up on it and chased it toward the other guy, who was waiting with some GladWare. It was a baby, an overall length of six inches. We caught it trying to sneak in our showers. Man, they move fast and they are hairy.

Speaking of showers, a few months ago I commented on the hot water situation. Well, it has been fixed—not by improving the hardware, but the cold water tanks sit in the sun all day. So there is cooler water in the hot tank than in the cold tank sometimes. Guys keep getting burned by the temperatures. We just can't win.

I have also found my appetite has decreased in the heat. However, shortly after we arrived, the food contract was changed and the service has gone from "hero to zero" in a few months. It is nice that we have a short order line, a regular line, and a salad bar, but the quality of food has deteriorated and become predictable. It's funny—my favorite meal every day is breakfast, and I eat the same thing everyday. Lunches are usually better than the dinner choice, but when it is hot I eat smaller portions.

I think I mentioned that going to the grocery store for us is driving to another camp and escorting the refrigerator trucks here. We provide the "gun trucks" for the 18-wheelers. It is a great way to get off the camp and out of the daily routine and move out of out operating area, and it takes up most of the day. The runs are not done on a regular or as-needed schedule, though, so we are not predictable for the bomb planters. This means sometimes we have everything we need for a salad except the lettuce, or no eggs for breakfast, or no bread. I am not complaining—I know the guy in charge of the contractors, he is a great guy and we help each other out. It is just the way it is.

Recreation

I am not sure if I mentioned in my last email about the "fun" stuff we do to de-stress other than running, push-ups, and sit-ups. We have a few volleyball courts and a tent with foosball, TV, and books. However, a softball field was recently constructed and we have inter-unit tournaments. Don't worry, the dugouts are mortar bunkers and our games are limited to three innings. I think we only have about 15 gloves and 5 bats on the whole camp. The average age for the guard units is closer to 37-40. We do have a few senior well-seasoned troops. One of which was going to catch a high slow pop fly—to most, an easy catch—however for some reason he stopped the ball, not with his glove but with his nose. We ended up having to evac him to another camp for surgery. He had a bone chip lodged in his sinus and they were worried about blood clots in his head. When he went for surgery they hooked him up to an EKG and something was not right. He ended up having an angiogram and he was rushed back to the States for a triple bypass. We were speculating that he could have had a heart attack out in the sun and that the softball injury, although comical, probably saved his life.

As I have mentioned before, my evenings are usually busy going to some meetings, getting reports together, and making sure guys are ready for the next few days. I have not been able to get into softball but been trying to get to salsa night. I think I might like it if I can make it on time. I enjoy the idea, although it is meant to be a couple's dance. We did the math and the ratio of males to females is probably 30:1. That is not counting the number of married people or the restrictions on rank. So I end up going to the class and having no one to dance with after.

Things Downtown

We are getting to know the people downtown and have a good working relationship. Although we do not patrol strictly on foot, we will stop and talk to people. My Arabic is improving. We have some regular trouble makers—local kids—and most recently we are working on visiting schools to give out supplies, toys, and things. There are several schools downtown and we ended up "adopting" an all-girls "high school." I figured out they took the average age of all the guys in the companies in the battalion and whoever had the highest number got the high school. Perhaps the unit with the highest average age would be married fathers. I did mention before that in addition to the orders on no alcohol, there is also no fraternizing with the locals. I guess we have come a log way from the Vikings and Sherman's march to the sea. Anyway, we still have yet to get to the school during hours since we have been working nights. I have been nominated the diplomat and overseer of public relations at the school, so I am curious to see how things go. We were really expecting to get a primary school and everyone has been writing home asking for coloring books, stuffed animals, and things for the little kids to enjoy. So once again we went out of our way and found our own school to adopt. The one we found was kind of out of the way, but the conditions are horrible. The students were, however, all polite. The all stand up in unison and greet us in Arabic and say a little prayer for the American troops. We are going to have to petition our chain of command to allow us to cover down on both schools.

We have also been involved in some operations on the other side of the spectrum. It is hard to remain neutral and let the new government work out its differences, but still be involved enough so the governors do not complain we are doing nothing to help them. We continue to interact with the Iraqi adults by training them to run their own police force and National Guard. We are also doing things to keep weapons and explosives off the streets. It is hard to know whom to trust when guys come up to us on the streets and tell us they know where they are selling weapons or where explosives are. We also still have to rely on the interpreters, who often wear masks so the people we are talking to do not recognize them. Last week we had a few near misses trying to follow up on "alleged intelligence." Everyone is good, we just get the feeling sometimes that the other shoe is going to drop sometimes in this fragile environment.

Again I would like to thank everyone sending me stuff both for me and the locals. Also, thanks for the emails. I am missing my life more and more everyday. We do the same thing day after day, seven days a week. Mail and email help to break up the cycle. If all goes well, we may be 1/3 or 1/4 of the way done with this tour.

(Click to enlarge the cartoon.)

What's in the News

2005-04-12T14:45:00.000+04:00

I think one of the reasons I have been depressed lately is because of the news in the Chow Hall. I think it ruined my appetite to hear about Terri Schiavo every time I went to eat. Some kind of Pavlov's dog response. After that two week ordeal, we began hearing about the Pope and speculated about the chances of leaving him on a feeding tube. We did hear at length about the Pope's illness and the process for electing a new Pope, and have been watching people stand in line to view his body. (Speaking of the Vatican, I'd like to throw in a plug for the book Angels & Demons by Dan Brown.) The death of the Pope has spawned much discussion this week about many topics. One discussion was about the difference between Catholic theology versus Catholic tradition. It is interesting how Christianity has spread through interpretation over the years. In this diversity we had Catholics arguing with Catholics arguing with Mormons and Protestants about different church views. After all our discussions we put our differences aside and went out to play nice with the Muslims since we are not allowed to proselytize. Many Muslims did however offer condolences to us for the loss of the pope.

There is another major pilgrimage this week in Iraq. The last two, one on my birthday and one on Easter, were from Najaf to Kabala. This one is from Kabala to Najaf. It is the third time in the three months we have been here that millions of Muslims will be walking through our area. This always seems to bring mixed messages. There are usually threats against us, and we take measures to protect ourselves while allowing the Muslims to observe their rites of passage. Unfortunately, the people walking the streets are no different from the college parties or post-sporting event celebrations outside Fenway. It is not the locals we are worried about; it is the out-of-towners. I have spoken with my local friends who work at our camp, and they insist their lives have improved tremendously since the coalition forces have been here. Through broken English, one man and I both had the common understanding that Iraq is much like France, Korea, Germany, and Japan. Although the American Army has destroyed many things for some political or tactical reason, we have liberated, rebuilt, and supported these countries afterward. The Iraqis I have spoken with also understand we are people as well as soldiers. They understand the sacrifice we are making to be away from our families for a long time so that the Iraqi children can grow up free, educated, and have a better quality of life.

In another conversation, an Iraqi was talking about the political game they play. There are corrupt leaders who are just like teenagers. The game is to intentionally do something wrong until you get caught and say, OK you caught me, now I will try some other way. I think the implication was that local governments or even Saddam was playing games to try to beat the system. Even the insurgents are playing the game. They keep using the same technique of bombs and suicide bombs until we catch on to it and adapt, and then they come up with something else.

We are supposed to be fighting the war on terrorism. I can not say that Saddam posed a direct threat against the U.S.; maybe that was part of the game. However, I see that Iraq is a better place and is becoming an even better place.

The area we are in is relatively quiet. Aside from some threats during the pilgrimage, we have been helping to support the transitional government any way we can. Sometimes it means staying out of the middle of their disputes so we do not appear to take sides. Other times we are on stand-by to break up a protest or assist in a transfer of authority from one party to the next. When we are not doing these special missions, patrolling, or running convoy security, we have been playing softball at our newly commissioned softball field. We also have a few volleyball nets and I have been trying to learn how to Salsa dance. Unfortunately, something always happens on Salsa night. Either we are on a mission or chasing helicopters. There are also no dance partners in my "group."

It has also been a rough week. I have been fighting through a sinus infection and was ordered to stay in bed for two days, but I could not. We had some guests from one of our Vermont units that is stationed in Kuwait, and we had a few big missions.

Three months in Iraq and the days are starting to drag. The internet has been very slow and I have not had the opportunity to check the last few weeks. The quiet part of my day has been between 8 and 10 in the morning. I have learned to get some little things done. As the day progresses the momentum picks up and before I know it, it is midnight and I have to get some sleep. The news has reported my unit being in the middle of an offensive campaign, which was not true so a response was sent in to the local papers telling a more accurate story. We are not aggressively fighting down here right now, but there has been the feeling that the other shoe will drop at some point. Hopefully things will go well for us. However, now that the Pope's funeral and Charles' wedding are old news, the war is becoming popular again.

Days Go By

2005-04-01T15:27:00.000+04:00

We have been here long enough to establish "steady state operations." What this means is periods of predictable change. Whenever things start to go smoothly, something changes. This is good because things never become boring, but in the long run I feel more and more tired. I have changed some of my daily activities from keeping busy to make the time pass, to enjoying moments of quiet time when I can to make up for the times we are really busy.

I did have a few adventures recently. We had to fly some Iraqi trainees to another camp for training. We patiently waited through the evening for the helicopters to arrive; however, they missed the landing zone and landed in one of the open areas near our dining facility. The tents in the area had been removed so the ground could be re-graded and raised to prevent flooding. The helicopters mistook the bare land for a suitable landing pad. The dilemma was the helicopter's proximity to my company's tents that were beginning to become unhitched and the group of trainees that we now had to move across the camp. I jumped in our company "up armored camp HMMWV," a.k.a. go-cart, and drove over to the landing site to ensure the helicopters did not take off. I also had to signal and guide the Iraqis with escorts to the helicopters. The guys in my unit and one of our sister companies were watching from our tent with night vision devices while I shuttled back and forth. It must have looked comical. When we were done I found myself ahead of the helicopters and took a breath. Then I realized as the speed of the rotors increased which way they were exiting the camp. With nowhere to go, it was like a scene from The Mummy; the sand preceded the two birds and continued to pummel me and my ride until at last the birds were safely off the ground and out of the camp. When I finally opened my eyes, I felt like I had three inches of sand stuck to my head.

There was also a beautiful thunderstorm here the other night. The temps here change so drastically at dawn and dusk that interesting weather patterns occur. We had a minor sand storm concurrently with an amazing lightning storm. Then as the weather grew colder, it rained off and on. I tried to capture it on video. The lighting conditions made the lightning impressive, and the fine sand and rain mixture gave an eerie illumination.

Trust

These times are also very frustrating because we are trying to work with the Iraqi people. My position affords me many opportunities to see this on various levels. I am often on patrol riding or walking through the streets in Iraq. I can always feel the vibe in the city. There are some days where it feels more like joyriding, sightseeing, and parading down the streets. Other times the hair on the back of my neck is crawling. On other days, I attend meetings with Iraqi officers or people on the street with complaints.

The reality is the Iraqi people still have much fear and apprehension and it is a delicate balance of trust. The Marines and the Army have both done damage in the cities we patrol and although it may be different people, the uniform stands out. Now we are trying to work with them, training them, giving them aid, and even passing out candy, toys, and toothbrushes for the kids. Under Saddam, the people knew what to expect. They feared him and knew the system was corrupt. Challenging the system got people shot or decapitated, or their families hurt. Now soldiers in the same uniforms are trying to help them. On the other hand, they have a newly elected government on top of old tribal customs, beliefs, politics, and corruption. The people do not know whom to trust and my heart goes out to them. We also rely on interpreters to accurately and correctly convey each of our thoughts and convictions. I watch as they talk and I can see and feel their emotions, not knowing which way to turn. On the other hand, the terrorists wear no uniforms, change their tactics, and often work as sleepers to gain trust and access before committing to a suicide bomb or something.

I still believe they are good people and keep reminding myself how long it took the U.S. to really become a united country and appreciating how diverse Americans are and the things we now take for granted. The American army is after all a microcosm of America held to a tighter standard by the Uniform Code of Military Justice. We are here to provide a positive example for the Iraqis as well as respect their beliefs. In doing so, we have given up more freedoms than being away from our families and we live on cots in tents. We have been given special orders that we are supposed to follow in addition to the Uniform Code: no alcohol, pornographic or explicit material, no proselytizing, no gambling, etc.

We are in a period referred to as stability and support operations, where although there is no open combat, there is always potential for something to happen.

Long(ing) Days

Overall, this is very draining. Between the weather, physical activity, and other factors, I have felt worn out. I have tried to make time to read, relax, and unwind by getting lost in a DVD, book, Tai-Chi, or meditating. Most often when I put my foot down to make time for myself, something happens downtown or someone shows up at the front gate looking for a sympathetic ear, which in many cases the real decisions happen many levels over my head. This week the media released a story indicating my company was the spearhead in a major offensive campaign here in the city. Soldiers were calling their wives who were in tears, not realizing that if they were calling on the phone, we probably weren't fighting. The truth happens to be very far from the media release. Last week was a Muslim holy week and we stepped down our patrols out of respect for the faith and for security, as there were many people from out of town. It was decided that we would allow the Iraqis to practice this pilgrimage that they were not afforded to practice during Saddam's times, while we watched quietly but still maintained visibility. Despite some problems with local police tensions, the celebration went off successfully with little or no incident. The worst thing we were prepared to do (but did not have perform) was search certain makes and models of cars with men military age in response to threats they were making against our troops.

With all this going on I have been at an emotional low. However, I was relieved today when I received several packages in the mail, and the letters from home and my civilian employer reminded me how much they miss my "quiet humor, cheerful smile, and easygoing willing-to-help personality." These words were not only very timely but also a welcome breath of fresh air and improved my spirits. Thank you.

Morale and Welfare

2005-03-21T00:49:00.000+03:00

Highlights of my week have been interesting. I have been up since 4:30 again and it is close to midnight now. The battalion has been talking rumors about moving again. So much for being settled. The weather has also changed again. Last week was chilly after the rain storm and this week the temps are already pushing into the 90s. Just in time to celebrate the warmer temperature, we have received threats of coordinated attacks in our area. I am not surprised. The next two weeks are Muslim holy weeks marking another pilgrimage from our town going north. Also the Christian holidays of Palm Sunday and Easter are the same two week period. To celebrate, we have been given the opportunity to wear our chemical gear and gas masks around camp wherever we go. The definition of terrorism is to cause terror, not to necessarily achieve any physical damage, but to achieve psychological damage. Therefore, airing on the cautious side we are now dragging more gear around in 90 degree heat. It's not so bad, except the portapotties are now that much smaller and quite a bit warmer.

In an attempt to increase morale, someone decided to host a salsa night. One of my soldiers tried to talk me into going. I told him I heard about this in Kuwait. A salsa night in a camp like this will turn out to be more like sausage night. There should be a prerequisite number of females attending or it will just be a bunch of guys standing around staring at each other listening to the music. He came to me the next day and told me I was mistaken. So I agreed to go with him again on another night and see for myself.

Today I spent a few hours talking to some of the Iraqis in the marketplace where they do haircuts, sewing, and sell some various creature comforts. At great detail he told me that all the Iraqi people are happy to see the Americans here. Before the war the people were, "very desperate and afraid and poor." He said the children would go to school and sit on the floor with no books and be very discouraged. Saddam and the Ba'ath party would keep most of the money and not give it to the people. He (Saddam) would spend the money on weapons and not the communities. He said our town was not so dirty until the war because they stopped putting money into the cleaning and the community. He said people were scared but they knew what to expect. The police shot people for not following Saddam's way and he controlled many things from the schools to the hospitals. My new friend lost both of his parents because of poor medical care. His doctor did not know how to treat a stroke victim or a heart condition (blocked artery).

He said things have changed and the people are happy to have the Americans here. The kids have desks, books, blackboards. Things are being rebuilt. He says some people do not understand; they see the American gas trucks coming into the camps and wonder why they have to go without power or heat. He says they don't understand that although Iraq has oil they still need to make it useful (refine). He says the problem with Iraqis right now is they have so many beliefs and political parties that nothing can be done. Muslims, Christians, Sunni, Shi'a, the different tribes, they all want their way. The Iraqi people need unity.

I told him America is like this, with many beliefs and parties and states. He said yes, all the Americans he meets are very kind, sympathetic, and good people. I did agree that it took time for America to become unified as well. We declared independence in 1776 but we were not really unified until after our civil war in 1865. He said yes, many people wish the Americans to leave but he feels there will be civil war. He continued to explain how the Iraqi people were good people and welcome these freedoms, but they are scared of the changes and not used to having this freedom. He said the real problem is that the Syrians, Jordanians, and Iranians think they need to free the Iraqi people from the Americans, when in fact they are hurting things. They are the ones with suicide bombs, attacks, and doing things to make Iraqis fight other Iraqis.

I told him it was hard for us to understand how to react in the town, since we have always trained to fight aggressively. Once we relaxed a little and looked around more, we noticed that the people here are nice and grateful. I also spoke with his boss who told me about his son and how much the American army has impressed him. I gave him a toy to bring home to his son. I think this war will take time, but we will have to win it through the generations starting with the kids.

The adults however, we have a different mission. We have been training the Iraqi Army, National Guard, police, and border patrol. One of the problems is non-Iraqis are smuggling weapons and attackers across the borders. One way to help the people here is to stop the combatants from entering the country. We have been sending these groups to various training camps. Coordinating transportation has been a difficult chore. Ground transport for Iraqi trainees is difficult, since a few classes received a bullet in the head after being hijacked on graduation day. So air transport is requested. As usual things get delayed for weather or to prevent conflicts in airspace. The trainees we were working with one day had graduated and were waiting transport home. The transportation was hours late. They became upset and argued with the translator. We asked what was going on and it was explained they were upset and missing their families. My boss told them, "We are here to train you so that you can run your own country without our help. You all volunteered to come here and train for your country. It has only been a few days since you have seen your families, but now you know how all the American soldiers feel and most of them will be away from thier families for more than a year." They all sat quietly after that and were very proud to leave when the transportation came and eagerly shook our hands goodbye.

Today was exeptionally exciting for me. One of my jobs is to keep the vehicles running and work with the maintenance shop. I stopped by in the morning after talking to my new friend. The maintenance shop told me they had all the parts in and we were trying to decide when a good day would be to work on our vehicles. We agreed on a few options and I went to pitch the idea to my boss. We agreed on taking tomorrow morning off, got permission from higher, and when the vehicles returned from patrol we were going to send them for maintenance. So I ran around and set everything up with all my gear on. Then a call came in and my commander had to go out on a short notice patrol. I had to run across the camp with all my crap and get to the mechanics before they took the vehicles apart, get the crews in their gear, and complete the passes. After all the running around I sent the patrol on their way and a call came over the radio that another class of Iraqi trainees were here. I had to run back across the camp and make arrangements for somewhere for them to stay until my commander returned and ended up seeing them off about an hour ago. I almost missed dinner again and then I had to get the guys and brief the training plans for the next couple of days.

Lent is almost over. I think I still have much more to give and give up in the months to come.

Here are a couple more pictures of my adventures this week.

An Interesting Development

2005-03-16T00:03:00.000+03:00

An interesting development unfolded over the weekend. One of the missions of this camp is to destroy enemy captured ammunition. A few days ago a lone camel had wandered into the impact area. Our quick reaction force and some of the staff went to check it out. They ended up wrestling it out of the area and bringing it inside the camp. Well it turns out not only was the camel pregnant and looking for some place to have its baby, but also it was the Sheik's "prize camel." He came by looking for it a day later. I was filled in on the story shortly after coming back from patrol. In the operations center there were huge plates of rice, pita bread, chicken, and fish. Everyone coming through the operations center had to eat some food and partake in the story. While I was eating I was counting the minutes since we had gone through the marketplace. As we saw a boy run out to wave to us, he had a live chicken in one hand and a bloody knife in the other hand. I wondered if this was the second time I was meeting the chicken.

In any event, the camel had its baby and I was on my way to collect the mail from the post office and deliver it to the guys, when the camel was being escorted off post. They put the baby in the back of a pickup truck and were using trucks and "golf carts" to herd the camel to the gate. The mother camel was doing her best to stay behind the pickup with her baby, but there were many distractions along the way. The Sheik was very happy and it was an interesting sight.

Battlefield Visualization

2005-03-15T23:49:00.000+03:00

See the terrain ... See the enemy ... See yourself.

The desert is not as most people expect. Last week the temperatures were pushing into the 90s; we thought this was it and we put our cold weather stuff away. Then we had a day of rain. It was not a cold rain but after walking outside 20 feet, we were soaked. The tents we sleep in have been battered by the sun and rain, so wherever the frame touches the tent fabric water seeps through. I found myself moving my little cot all night to find the spot where water did not drip on my face. Since it has rained, the temperatures have dropped and we are back to wearing cold weather gear. There is also a large number of pools of water in our camp after the rain. The animals are starting to come out too. We have seen ants and other beetles. Of course flies are making as frequent trips to the portajohns as we are. We have two people in our brigade being treated for Rabies after playing with the cute little wild puppies. I have still yet to see the big three: scorpions, snakes, and spiders. In fact, I had to keep reminding the guys when we stop on the side of the road in our travels: don't just look for bombs, mines, and booby traps, but also keep your eyes out for wildlife.

The thing that impresses me most about the desert is the moon and the stars. There were a few weeks when the sun set after dinner and the moon did not rise for three or four more hours. With no street lights or trees, the moon has a greater impact on the light conditions. When the sun went down after dinner, we were all stumbling around in the dark trying not to trip on the gravel or run into the concrete barriers. Later on when the moon rose, we could see clearly from one end of the camp to the other in the middle of the night. The stars here are amazing. I see many more than any other place I have been. With the horizon so open, flat, and no ambient light, the constellations are impressive. It's like those movie scenes where two people are looking up at the same star thousands of miles apart. It would almost be romantic, except I am in my helmet, sweaty uniform, and dusty face running around in the pitch black.

We have been getting briefed almost every night describing how fragile the political situation is and we expect the worst when we go on patrol. Since the elections there has been changes, even in local leadership. The police chief was fired a few times and the old government was asking for help getting rid of him. We decided to stay out of the middle of it and when the new governor took over, he reinstated the police chief. There are also some big political players in our area that have been keeping quiet or keeping things under control. Being out on patrol reminds me of being in high school after getting my license, not having a job yet and doing nothing but driving around looking for friends, girls, something to do, or some trouble to get in. We ride around not in any hurry to get anywhere, but to gauge the mood of the local people, look for any contraband items, or observe the interactions of the local authorities. I would not even speculate to say we are acting like police since it is not our responsibility to pull over or arrest anyone. If we see something out of place we call our higher headquarters and they try as much as possible to get the local law enforcement to take care of it while we hang out for back up.

Patrols also feel like being in a parade. We ride around waiving to everyone (mostly kids). In addition to our patrols, we run security for supplies in and out of our area. We pick up vehicles from one place and escort them to another. These right now are the more dangerous missions. We generally travel at high speeds over the desert and try not to stop. Going through built up areas are difficult with traffic control and security, as are rural or barren areas where the danger is improvised explosives.

I hope my analogies convey how it feels to be over here without making light of the situation. In my time in the army, we have always trained to be aggressive and assertive. This is a different type of conflict; winning the war means winning the kids, the parents, and the grandparents, not attriting our enemy through shock, firepower, and maneuver.

We have a decent rotation for the guys so they do not get bored or burnt out. We rotate them on missions as much as possible depending on the requirements. That allows them time for laundry, concurrent training, mail, and internet. I find that no matter what, I keep myself busy from the time I get up until I go to bed. I end up with most of the odd jobs and coordinating with the other units. I do manage to get out on the missions, and I like it. I have been frustrated occasionally, usually from a wild goose chase or a miscommunication that results in wasted time or effort. The few times I take a few minutes to relax and stay in one spot too long, someone finds me to do something else or something happens and I end up running around even more.

We have a good family and community here. We all have that common bond of being soldiers and in general help each other out. Unfortunately, it is not the same as being home. There are many freedoms we don't have and I have tried to keep things simple so I will appreciate them when I go home. I thought about getting more comfortable since we may be here over a year, but we could end up moving to a different camp on short notice if the powers that be decide it is a good idea. Being eight hours ahead of your friends and family with a busy schedule does not give much time for phone calls unless I get up early or stay up late. My evenings are filled with meetings and planning for the next few days. It also takes me two or three days to gather my thoughts and have time to write them down for my emails. Then when I do, the internet is not working or overly crowded.

Between Iraq and a Hard Place

2005-03-05T16:56:00.000+03:00

First, I would like to say I did not mean to scare or offend anyone by recent message indicating we had taken casualties. We are holding steady at three mice for the week. It was a tough choice, but I would rather not attract poisonous snakes or large flesh eating spiders. Weather reports and previous occupants indicate we are three weeks out from temperatures in the 100-120s. It was almost 80 today and the porta johns are becoming ovens already.

Let's talk about the political climate far to near. They have TVs in our chow halls, so we don't get completely disconnected from the outside world's current events. The news stories we are receiving indicate that North Korea and Iran are not happy or wanting attention. I'm hoping we don't get any missiles pointed in our general direction or get volunteered to be the spear head north or east. On the other side, Syria and Lebanon keep showing up in the news after the assassination of the former prime minister and talks of action over there. Meanwhile we are supporting a city here whose police chief has been fired twice but he is senile, will not leave his post, and has many supporters. The acting governor has instated a replacement and the local police are divided. The election results have been announced for their "congress," and there was big procession a few weeks ago of devout Muslims who will mutilate themselves in honor of Mohammad's grandson who was assassinated.

We have a group of guys from our company manning a detention center and I watched them process one of the guys a patrol brought in for questioning. The rest of the guys are on security and other details inside the camp when we are not patrolling. The way it works is much like a town or condo association. Although there are several companies here with different tactical missions and their own chain of command, we all have to work together to support the community by performing various duties. Soldiers get tasked out for everything from guarding a tower to watching the internet cafes.

We received our HMMWVs a little over a week ago. After having two days to do a good job on maintenance, we were thrown right into the mix. Our first convoy was supposed to be easy, although it was at night. All we had to do was drive out to another camp and secure mail for three camps and pick up some supplies. The first problem was the camp we went to was outside of "F-Town," which has been pretty popular in the news before we arrived here. I think it is still a very active spot. The second problem is during our map recon, we were told an explosive device was just detonated on the route we planned on taking that killed one soldier and injured two soldiers. There were some bypasses but we had to weigh the risks. We ended up taking the straighter route since it was our first time up there and we had another platoon that made the run a few times to help guide us. We were on our way and just beyond the spot where the explosive went off. We heard a big pop. One of the HMMWVs blew a tire and another truck was slowly leaking air out of its tire. We had to quickly change it and complete the trip to the camp.

Once we were there we finished loading the mail, supplies, and sent our tires down to be replaced or repaired. We left in the late afternoon for our camp. Everyone was excited because the mail had been waiting for a few weeks and we filled two 8ft by 50ft conexes full of mail. On the way back in the SAME spot as the explosion and the previous problems, we had a blow out on one of the trucks carrying mail. We had to secure the area and wait for the recovery truck. Two and a half hours later it arrived with the wrong lug wrenches, so we had to unload all the mail onto the other vehicles and head home. Once we came back, we unloaded all the mail which had to be sorted before we could have it, so we went to get some sleep after 22 hours on the road.

Once we got up, we were informed we had another mission to escort food trucks from a "truck stop" to our camp. It was another mission that we end up doing during the night. This time we did not have the benefit of a guide so we relied on our own maps and GPS. We did get stuck on some construction areas and it was a long drive. The worst part was coming back our camp is out in the open. When we crested the plateau we could see the camp for miles, we thought we were almost there and could finally sleep. The camp never got any closer. It seemed like forever, but it was only 45 min when we finally made the turn to the front gate.

We finally had a day off the next day to work on the vehicles and get our mail. There was tons of it. I guess what happened is small convoys were going up and grabbing what they could and the mail was slowly making its way to our camp. Unfortunately, they were always taking the stuff in front so the old mail kept piling up.

The rest of the week we spent learning the city we will be patrolling for our tour of duty. The guys running the missions were having a hard time getting used to the tempo we are trying to operate. This phase of the "war" is difficult because there is no open aggression. We are here to maintain a positive presence, deter terrorists, and help the Iraqis gain control over their country. We always train for the worst, thinking everyone is trying to kill us, but that is not the case. Most people are friendly and the Iraqi national guard and Iraqi police are cooperating. We have to drive aggressively to protect ourselves but be one step below road rage so we don't hurt any civilians. It is very much like driving downtown Boston around Faneuil Hall and the Big Dig. Some days there are road blocks were there were not before. It could be Iraqi police doing their job or the locals throwing rocks and trash in the street because they don't feel like having us rush past them on patrol. We do have one advantage over our Mississippi sister companies: we know how rotaries/traffic circles work. This town has several and we have learned to squeeze our 7-ton HMMWVs down tight alleys. We ride around locked and loaded ready to kill, but we spend most of the time waiving to children and memorizing the terrain with both eyes wide open.

The terrain here is varied. The side of the city near the Euphrates reminds me of the Riverway on the Charles River in Boston near the Hatch Shell, although I do not think it is as wide as the Charles here. I keep looking for the "reverse curve" sign that has been altered to read "reverse the curse." I thought the Euphrates would be a little more impressive since it is "the cradle of civilization." Moving west from the Euphrates, there are markets and shops that I would liken to Haymarket or Chinatown in Boston. There are open-air markets that sell all sorts of odds and ends from TVs and satellite dishes to flea market items. There are also fresh fish, live chickens, and various fruits and vegetables for sale. On the other side of town, there is a cemetery that spans ten miles sitting on cliffs. We travel on a road just beyond the cemetery and it looks almost like the "well of souls" from Raiders of the Lost Ark should be out there somewhere. Most of the city is in various stages of development from little mud and thatch huts to homemade brick, three-story buildings. Unfortunately, a lot of the landscape reminds me of the landfill in Hull on the end of Nantasket Beach where my grandfather used to take me. There is a lot of garbage strewn around and it appears they just dig a burn pit every now and then burn the trash and then cover the burn pit.

On yesterday's patrol we found out just how serious things could get real quick. We received intel about a specific type of vehicle suicide bombers have been using and we spotted one and decided we should get the plate number as we drove by casually. Somehow things got confused with traffic and we ended up pulled over blocking this guy in. I managed to get a photo of the plates, but we were way too close when were passing and got stuck next to this guy. I was yelling over to the guy in the seat next to me, "Look in the car, look in the car!" He froze for a second and we were yelling to the lead vehicle to find a way to get out and move. I glanced over and saw the car was full of a family so things seemed OK. If it had been a bomber, perhaps he will use a different car now or perhaps he would have panicked and detonated.

Earlier in the day we were taking a security halt in the town to fix some minor issues like tie-down antennas before we take out the power lines like my uncle did in Boston. I think I may make the National Guard paper though. While we were stopped I figured I would set a good example for the guys so I hopped out of the HMMWV with the machine gun and secured our front right. My commander saw me through the windshield and snapped a picture. He said he would send it to the Public Affairs and try to get it printed in our local Guard magazine.

We are still relying on our laptops, DVDs, and the internet tent to take our minds off the situation. For just a few hours we can forget where we are and relax, but once we walk out our tent or leave our camp we have to be on point.

I keep thinking about a famous Greek vase we studied in college depicting Ajax and Achilles calmly playing chess inside a tent while the Trojan War rages around them. Sorry, ladies, I'm no Brad Pitt, but brief moments of peace are appreciated.

Quick Reaction

2005-02-26T23:00:00.000+03:00

Now that we have our vehicles, the daily routine is starting to change. We spent a whole day tearing the vehicles apart and changing fluids and checking all the systems. The next day we wanted to go for a test drive and stretch our legs and put to practice some of our training and see what works and what we need to adjust. We still have many guys on camp security so when we sent the patrol out I was able to be the machine gunner. We went flying down the road at 50 miles an hour with me in the turret. I was feeling a little safer than I did when we came north now that we are in the armored HMMWVs.

We just ran down the street to another camp where some of our sister units are. It was a good ride and we were able to get some fresh air. Imagine living and sleeping in your office and not being able to leave your work property except with a carpool of your coworkers and boss.

Today we were working on load plans for a mission sometime this week. We wanted to pack our equipment in case we had a mission on short notice. My job was to change the security codes on the radios. While I was doing that, one of the watch officers from the control room came running over and said there was something going on outside the gate and I needed to send one of my platoons out to check things out. So I ran and grabbed some of the other leaders and had them gather guys coming off guard shift and woke some other guys up. Meanwhile I crawled back in and laid across the seat of the HMMWV to finish installing the radio codes. Next thing I hear is boots next to my head and feel a belt of ammo across my leg. The guys were prepping the vehicle while I worked. I had enough time to jump out of one vehicle and send them along to get more info while I loaded up with the rest of the guys. I grabbed my armor and took off for the control room. As things progressed, the guys got their game faces on and we understood there was a vehicle outside our camp with people carrying weapons. We were put on standby to back up the camp security. Then another report came around that some people were captured and were to be held at the camp. I called the control and recommended we stand down because one of the platoons was supposed to support the detention center and half of the guys were with me on standby. I sent the guys back to the tents while I ran back to the control center and debriefed the officer in charge.

I grabbed a quick sandwich and headed to another briefing. After that, some of us went to the detention center to check on our guys there and watched them work. It is almost bedtime now and I have just finished the coordination for the guard shifts between the camp security and the detention center. Tomorrow I am back where I started today, prepping for the mission this week to get the mail.

If you ever have a bad day at work, I recommend printing these pictures and hanging them on your door. Hopefully your day won't be so bad or at least as crazy as mine.

Pictures

2005-02-26T17:03:00.000+03:00

It's the blogmistress here. Scott sent along some photos that I finally got around to posting. See February 11, 14, and 24. Others will be posted as I receive them.

This is my personal favorite, a pic that doesn't pertain to anything in particular except that he took the Red Cross "blood drop" with him. It adds a little splash of color to the desert, doesn't it?

Long Day

2005-02-24T23:44:00.000+03:00

My day started early or never ended. Last night we agreed to support one of our sister companies by providing a truck to take some sensitive secret equipment to another camp. The catch was the convoy was leaving at 2am and I received the mission at 8pm, six hours notice. I was going to go and then the commander decided he did not want me to go. By the time the coordination was made it was almost 10pm and I had to brief someone else to take my spot. I gave very clear and specific directions to link up with the convoy and who to give the sensitive equipment to.

I went to bed at midnight and did not sleep well wondering if I should have gone, because I had all the details. I got up at 6am and checked in to make sure the guys left with the convoy and then I took a group to the range to fire some more machine guns as we prepare to do patrols regularly. Things were going well and I was pleased with the trainers and the sergeants in charge. Upon returning to the control center to check in I was yanked out of my HMMWV by a captain wondering why I was not on the convoy and where my truck and the sensitive equipment was. I told him I was absolutely sure my guys and the truck were in fact on the convoy and they were very trustworthy and detail oriented. So the Captain handed me over to two majors and another captain who started in on me saying the guys never checked in with the convoy commander and how could they sneak in to the convoy. I told them all they had to be there. That they had to drive right by the convoy to leave our motorpool where we kept our truck and there were no other units leaving that early. I could not imagine what they were doing, they could not be hiding inside the camp all morning. So one major gave in and called the destination and found out the sensitive equipment was delivered and I was off the hook. The other major was not happy but he dropped it.

My guys did not return as scheduled, and I was worrying and wishing I had gone. I went with my commander to find out where they were when they pulled in at dinner time, with a truck full of mail. Everyone was excited to see them safe and see the mail. Unfortunately there was another truck full of mail with our units stuff. So we unloaded the mail and went for dinner.

After I recounted my day to the guys, two lieutenants sat next to me complaining about their long day. I asked them if they were on the convoy with my guys and they said yes. I asked them if there were any problems and they said no. So I told them my end of the story. It turns out they were in charge of the convoy and my guys were on time and did exactly what I told them. They were going to speak to the other officers for me.

We still have a whole truck load of mail to be sorted and the guys know it is here and they can not wait until tomorrow for us to pick it up from the post office. It is like Christmas; I hope we will not be disappointed.

As for the rest of my day, we are getting ready to assume our share of the patrols now that we have vehicles. So we have this weekend to get everything ready soup to nuts. We have the guys divided into teams to train the crews on the routes, prepare the load plans on the vehicles, and set up a staging area near our tents. So when the "Bat light" goes on we are ready to roll.

It is now almost midnight again and I am unwinding before bed. Here is a picture without my "cool guy ballistic sunglasses." The temperatures are climbing here and the critters are starting to come out...

Birthday Wishes

2005-02-19T20:04:00.000+03:00

I had a pretty good day today. We went to the range outside camp this morning and I got to shoot almost every weapon system that we have as well as run the range for the guys we brought out. When I came back I had my reports turned in and I decided to treat myself. I set out a new clean uniform and decided to risk a shower. My one Birthday wish was for a warm shower and I was granted my wish. Upon returning the EODs were destroying some captured ammo, but I convinced myself and my supply sergeant that it was a 21 gun salute for me. I had also been saving a special treat for today. Underwear made of cationic polyester and lycra. It feels like silk and it does not stick. This is definitely the way to go as the temperatures here are already starting to push into the 80s. I don't think I will ever give women a hard time about buying expensive underwear ever again.

Of Mice and Men

2005-02-15T11:35:00.000+03:00

We have taken our first casualty here. Yes. We finally caught our mouse. We caught him on sticky paper and after taking some crap from the guys I managed to relocate the little guy and escorted him to a dumpster. The guys in the other tents suggest we start a critter catching competition.

Speaking of dumpsters our trash is burned. Nothing like the smell of burning plastic to wake up to. On the other hand they detonate captured munitions in the evenings, so we get an acoustic fireworks show in the evenings when they ignite small arms, and when the EODs detonate mortars it is like scenes from "Mary Poppins." In the middle of our conversations the tents shake and things become crooked. We fix them without missing a beat during our conversation.

We are also getting used to the test firing of the patrol's machine guns as they leave the gate for their patrol. Our company has also had the luck of being close to the LZ and whenever air comes it makes it difficult for us huddled around laptops to hear the DVDs we are trying to watch. We are trying to time it right during some war movies to get the real surround sound effect.

I am also still having mixed feelings about the foreign nationals working here. On one hand I do respect different cultures and they always appear polite, but basic hygiene skills are lacking. We have to guard and lock the portajohns near the front gate to prevent finger painting on the walls. Flea collars are no longer allowed to be worn because too many soldiers are getting sick, probably from not washing hands after putting them on or leaving them directly on skin and sweating. I was smart enough to roll my socks over them. Speaking of wildlife, no spiders or snakes yet, just the flies coming out. Our midday highs are getting into the 70s and the camp is beginning to take on a whole new smell.

There is still political tension in town with the elections and there is a holy week that starts on Saturday. I don't think I can convince them to celebrate on my account. In fact the religious rite is called Ashura, and it signifies the beheading of Husayn. The Muslims who participate mutilate themselves in honor. We are trying to figure out our patrol schedule to work around the holiday but maintain a presence.

I have been doing some praying myself. It is hard to find a quiet spot, but I some of the guys appreciate my beliefs and have been acommidating and curious. I have also given a tai-chi demonstration.

I hope you are doing well.

Valentine's Patrol

2005-02-14T12:13:00.001+03:00

Happy Valentines Day!

It will be a day to remember for me. My first combat patrol... to get the mail.

Miss you.

Thanks

2005-02-12T05:16:00.001+03:00

Thanks again everyone for the emails, thoughts, and prayers. I wish I had the time to write everyone back but I try to answer everyone's questions when I write to the group. I was not able to catch the Super Bowl; I guess it started at 6 and not 8 like we heard. I caught some of the post game at breakfast. Happy Valentines day!

Daily Life

2005-02-11T08:25:00.001+03:00

We are staying in a quad of ten-man tents. There are four rows of ten tents. In between each tent is either a concrete barrier wall or a concrete mortar bunker. The ground outside the tents is loose gravel. I have given up drinking anything after dinner because the porta johns are at least 50 yards from the tent. One is a straight dash down the gravel road; the gravel that will roll your ankle if you get ahead of yourself. The closer porta john is through the maze of concrete barriers, not fun if you take a wrong turn and it is chilly out. There are also no lights in the portajohns.

I wake up in the morning between 5 and 6am and work out. It is barely light enough out to see in the mornings. After my work out, I receive the morning reports from the platoon leaders and take a shower. The water here is recycled. They basically filter the grey water and put it back in the tanks. So we brush our teeth with Listerine or bottled water. After that I eat breakfast and spend the morning evaluating the platoon training, coordinate supplies and equipment, and run errands around the camp. In the evening it gets pitch black and we do some night training and attend the brigade and battalion briefings.

We have many foreign nationals working at our camp. They sell odds and ends, do our laundry, work the dining hall, and clean the portajohns and shower trailers. Some of the Muslims still practice the old ways, like the left hand is better than toilet paper, "men are for pleasure, women are for making babies." Things like that. They have special badges and are always supervised by a US soldier or contractor. I understand the concept; we are trying to play nice together.

As far as other little things that make this different from home. We carry our weapons everywhere and have to re-clear them before entering the chow hall, then we wash our hands. We also use the alcohol hand sanitizer after using the portajohns. The problem with washing and sanitizing is the dust. I still always feel like my hands are dirty or dry. We also don't go anywhere without our sunglasses mostly for the dust, hey not only are they ballistic sunglasses but they look cool.

Lip balm is another challenge with the dust. My lips are either dry and chapped or the lip balm catches the dust and I taste dirt all day. We also have a mouse in our tent and we are trying to catch it before we attract snakes.

On our ride in, we saw fruit stands along the road. Tomatoes everywhere. I wonder how supply and demand works with stands every 25 feet and nothing but tomatoes. They look good nice bright red big tomatoes. Then we remembered. They really don't have plumbing here, so the "tomato fields" are fertilized by raw sewage.

Oh, the weather here is not what everyone expects. It has been 40 degrees and it rains.

The camp is in the state of turn over. There are Marines leaving and the Army is taking over. Things in the nearby town are unstable. The Chief of Police was fired and they have not replaced him; the governor assumed he would not win the elections and he decided to leave town. They have also postponed the election results after some tampering by the Sunnis. Things will be tense around here for awhile and I am sure you know North Korea and Iran are acting up. It is hard to believe I have been gone for about three months already.

New Home

2005-02-06T07:32:00.001+03:00

I made it safely... well as safe as it is here. It was a wild ride. When we crossed the border it was like night and day between the two countries. Although Northern Kuwait is still rebuilding from GW1, it is far superior to its neighbor. As we crossed, the kids and dogs came running up to the convoys to see and wave. It was like being in a national geographic episode. Except I remembered I was holding a loaded weapon and we were riding down the road at 45mph. The terrain varied as far as lack of vegetation; some spots were all sand and some had nice trees and grasses. Mud huts and grass huts peppered the landscape and we saw a variety of animals from cows, sheep, goats, dogs and camels. Most of the people seemed accepting of us, but then again it was a well traveled route. One of the convoys veered off and they said the mood changed. For the most part the kids were very friendly, waving, asking for food, and giving "thumbs up." The adults watched pretty emotionlessly. We hit some checkpoints that were "police" checkpoints that forced us to slow down. They were tense as they don't wear uniforms and all carry machine guns. We could not tell if they were shouting at us or to us so we kept weapons ready and smiled and waved. On the other side there were guys trying to peddle cigarettes and other trinkets. One guy held two cartons and said, "Two-hundred." I do not know what the exchange is but if he wanted American dollars. I think they have democracy covered and we don't need to be here. I hope he wanted two-hundred of his money.

After several minor incidents, we managed to make it to the base (I don't have time to go into the details). We made it late Thursday and there are no lights in the "streets" or outside the tents and chow hall, as a preventive measure for mortar attacks. So we had to quickly learn how to walk around in the dark without crashing into the concrete barriers that protect us.

I had to find my guys Friday morning and the base is in the middle of a turn over, so no one really knows where anyone is because we are all moving around from transient tents to permanent tents as they become available. I found my guys by waiting outside the chow hall. Speaking of that, the food here is excellent. We have been busy unpacking and assuming control of the base, so this is the first time I had to use the internet cafe. Sorry no cappucchinos here. Just a tent with laptops on a satellite connection.

As far as living conditions, we have been bartering and scavenging from the Marines who are leaving. I currently have a cot, foot locker, and three cardboard boxes that are serving as my nightstand and dresser. I an using the footlocker for my desk and its not too bad.

Hopefully we will be able to catch part of the Super Bowl during breakfast tomorrow. They do not have newspapers, but there are TVs with the news and sports at the chowhall.

I may fly with the Captain to the Saudi border Tuesday.

Take care. Miss you all. I will write some more when we get settled.

Leaving Kuwait, Finally

2005-01-26T23:41:00.001+03:00

I am just checking in before I leave Kuwait, finally. In summation the highlights for reasons to leave in the top ten format.

See you in Iraq... I will send my Kuwait pictures when I get set up.

Miss you all.

Covert Operations

2005-01-20T13:28:00.001+03:00

I am sneaking into the Brigade office "tent" to write... One of the Majors in the Battalion just busted me though. He says it's okay. I just wanted to write in person and let everyone know I am OK. We were training at a fast pace in MS and now we have hit a brick wall. We did have a long flight and went right into training to confirm the sight alignment on our weapons, two more mandatory training videos and we are waiting on logistics. We are upgrading the armor on our vehicles and sorting out the equipment as it comes off the boats. We were supposed to head north Tuesday, however there were complications and now we have to wait indefinitely. I am not sure if it is just a coordination issue or if there are other issues preventing us from landing.

The camp we are at is barely big enough to hold the volume of troops here. Everything is a line including meal time and portajohns. We are still living out of our backpacks and the desert is not as exotic as one may think. Blue sky and tan sand, not too colorful. The guys are great and despite some frustration and anticipation everyone is doing well.

I miss you all and encourage pictures from "home."

Take Care and miss you.

My Pictures

2005-01-13T13:13:00.001+03:00

I had the opportunity to do laundry in between turning in vehicles, and one of the guys from the Mississippi unit showed me some clouds as they passed by. They were tornado clouds swirling. It was interesting to see. I had one of the guys take my pictures in my desert uniform. Other than that now much else going on today. We should be finishing packing this afternoon and have one last change to go back out in civilization.

Take Care and talk to you on the other side of the ocean.

Playing Army

2005-01-09T17:28:00.001+03:00

It is a beautiful day here, 73 degrees and sunny. Although this is the calm before the storm, it is a very peaceful day. We got up at 5am today and went to the rifle range one last time to verify our sight alignment on our rifles, then the platoons were practicing the different tasks we learned how to do in the past month. Partly to refresh their memory because we trained at such a fast pace, but they got a chance to practice the skills they chose and wanted to do as opposed to the tasks they were told to learn for the day. It was fun--they went into the mock town and took turns being civilians and bad guys, then they did a convoy back to our command post and were going to assault our building but I saw and heard them coming. I grabbed one of the other lieutenants and we barricaded the doors quickly and I got a few of them before they saw me, but my buddy did not have my back so one of the platoon guys got behind me from a different door before I turned around. I think this is one of the few times that "playing army" actually is fitting for the training we did today. They guys are practicing things they need to but are having fun and making it creative.

Now we are packing and preparing to leave beautiful Camp S. We still do not know what flight we are leaving on but it will most likely be Friday or Saturday. We have three days of training for the guys while I run around and turn in equipment and get supplies. I was also selected to be the authorized classified document currier. I thought I was cool at first and then I went to get the paperwork done. I have to carry a flash "thumb" drive around my neck all the time and see secret documents. When I left the office with my additional assignment, I ran into the chaplain who was handing out lotion, baby powder, and tic tacs. I handed me a tube of petroleum jelly. I do not know if that was a coincidence or not but suddenly I had the feeling that there may be some more "extra duties" for this job.

We are giving the guys the afternoon off to pack clean weapons and we are switching over do the desert uniforms tomorrow. We are also sitting outside enjoying the day and stenciling our roster number and blood type on all our T Shirts. I hope everyone else is enjoying the weekend. I'm not too sure if we will pack our electronics up and send them ahead, but I will make some phone calls before I fly.

HMMWVS

2005-01-07T00:30:00.001+03:00

I did not get to finish my email this morning. I had wanted to go into some more detail about out training mission on the urban training lane. They had a mock town set up with marked buildings that included burned out cars, Arabic writing, and animals running around. There was also Iraqi and Arabic Refugees along with other paid civilians to interact and cause confusion and interrupt the battle. The whole training focus is on being prepared to be lethal yet use every effort to resolve the situation by other means. This has been a hard concept for our hard core tankers from Vermont who are used to blowing things up on contact or otherwise running over them with the tracks. We are forced to be less lethal and more exposed.

Our mission was to secure five suspected insurgent leaders from a fictional town in Iraq. The idea is the town was trying to have a democracy with the use of a mayor but the local Sheik had more sway over the population. We had to negotiate with the mayor to allow use to enter his town armed and search the town for suspected terrorists and solicit the use of the local police to go knocking door to door. Our secondary goal was to capture intelligence or weapons present in the town.

Things started off well we had one platoon with vehicles block roads and set up check points to control entry and exit from the towns. They also had roving patrols on foot to flush out snipers. The second platoon was going to negotiate and conduct the search. The third platoon over watched the town from far and had the machine guns and the reinforcements. I was with part of a platoon that was to enter the town from the wood line and hang out in the sewer tunnels and reinforce and assist the search teams. The negotiations ended up breaking down and the crowd started to become hostile. We ended up having to pass the reserves through the tunnels to support the platoon that still was trying to make the negotiations work. Finally, the tide turned and the platoon started to split up and forcibly occupy and clear the buildings. I was still hanging out in the sewer tunnels getting bitten by ants. After clearing four buildings and detaining several town people I found myself supervising the enemy prisoner handling point. Initially this was in the sewer tunnel and we eventually consolidated in one of the buildings. Our intelligence was not accurate and we were unsure who was just unruly townsfolk and who were the guys and girls we were looking for. So I found myself pushing forward running from building to building in the smoke and confusion of the town trying not to run over or shoot the civilians. We ended up flushing out some more of the insurgents and pockets of battle were taking place in different locations. I ended up setting up a operations center in one of the taller buildings and was trying to push information from the platoons and commander to keep everything organized. This was not an easy task. We ended up taking sniper fire, and having spontaneous pockets of fire fights while people were milling about the streets selling trinkets, asking for cigarettes, wanting to have tea with us or just otherwise trying to confuse and disrupt our tempo. We ended up capturing four people that made the list and killing one of them. Finally we leapfrogged all our squads our of the town and cleared our of the city.

It made for a long day but it put many things together that we were doing. The trainers really try to crank things up and throw a lot at us and make us think and react. The idea is that it will be unlikely for all these things to happen at once, but if we can handle the level of difficulty in a training environment, the real thing should not be as bad. If you want more of a feel for what we were going through try watching the movie "Blackhawk Down."

Today we did close combat training will live rounds. We had plastic targets with painted shapes on them and we had to move down lanes with and without cover firing into the plastic silhouettes when someone randomly called out a shape. All our targets were 25 meters away or less and we were moving in pairs and groups of four.

They kicked up the level of difficulty by making us ground our weapon and run back to the ammo point, get the magazines and then run back to the round and had 15 seconds to lock and fire. (Mind you, we have about 45lbs of helmet, body armor, and other crap on.) They made it more fun for the officers and leaders. We had to chase the guy with our ammo. I was running against another Lieutenant and the ammo guy ran up the hill and we chased him and the other LT pushed me in front of my commander and first Sergeant. I had to leap over them. Coming down the hill he grabbed my vest and I lost my balance. I managed to grab the magazines and on the way down I completely lost my balance and had to employ my "John Woo Combat Roll" (refer to Samuel Jackson in the movie SWAT). So yeah, I pretty much tripped in front of the whole company, but I managed to recover with the combat roll and save my pride and cool points to make it back to the firing point. We finished the lane and I was applauded by the guys. I wonder how sore I will be tomorrow.

We also had our first intel brief from our battalion commander. Things are starting to get really focused as we prepare for our move. He showed us pictures of the area we will be going and we discussed the impact of the elections and that the town will be celebrating a religious holiday for the first time that was outlawed during Saddam's rule.

I am still feeling pretty good about the whole thing. Most of my frustrations have been equipment issues. We are hearing that all the good equipment is already deployed and there isn't enough stuff here to train on. We are not the best army in the world because we always have the best equipment; we are the best army in the world because our soldiers have the freedom and ingenuity to make things work.

God Bless America.

P.S. For all the cool toys we have (lasers, scopes, night vision, radios), the enemy is using dogs to do a better job detecting us. The dogs know we smell different and keep us from sneaking up on the insurgents in the dark.

Kuwait Update

2005-01-06T09:23:00.001+03:00

We just finished our urban training exercises. More fun with Iraqi refugees, civilians on the battlefield, and insurgent activities. This time we were operating in a small town rather than our base. I did not get killed this time. My position dictated that I supervise the handling of enemy prisoners and disgruntle civilians and set up as an overwatch to listen and report activity in the city. I still had to run tactically from building to building and ended up getting muddy, harassed, and shot at, but the most damage I incurred was the ant bites. It is still warm down here but it has been humid and rainy.

The big news, however, is we will be on stand by to leave anywhere from the 9th-15th to go to Kuwait. We will not be able to receive any regular mail until we get established in Iraq. On or about Valentines day. They will not forward any mail from the base; it will be returned. We will not know our final address and confirm our location until we are ready to leave Kuwait. I read the movement order last night and I know where we are going, but it is still classified, sorry. I will be happy to leave the base behind and hopefully overcome some of the uncertainty, anxiety, and anticipation we have been dealing with.

Got to run, time to go back in the field and shoot some more bullets.

Rough Week

2004-12-27T22:26:00.001+03:00

We are back out of the field for Christmas. We have done some interesting things this week. We had a full day of classes on cultural and situational awareness which included everything from Iraqi history and current tactics. My job at the Red Cross required us to use tracking and trending and random sampling as tools to help solve problems and conduct checks. Well it seems the enemy "insurgents" are also using these tools to figure out our weaknesses. If we use the same routes or follow the same schedule we become predictable and become more susceptible to ambush. This covers everything from patrols to sleeping and eating.

The leadership challenge is to find some doctrine to maintain order and discipline, but vary enough so not to become complacent or predictable. Yes, for the Star Trek fans it is like fighting the "Borg." We have actually developed some tactics and techniques that should work well.

I was also faced with another leadership challenge last week, which left me with very little free time. My company commander was determined to be non-deployable for medical reasons. This meant that I have been in charge doing his job running the company and coordinating training with the Camp Shelby trainers and our higher unit. I have also been trying to keep up with my job. In the middle of all this we had a five day live fire exercise with many moving parts. We had .50 cal. machine guns and M249 machine guns mounted on HMMWVs and we had the guys on the ground with grenade launchers and rifles. Lots of moving parts and live bullets. Not to mention the final exam was at night in a thunder storm. It was pretty intense, since the national guard is normally allocated only 49 rounds per year to qualify on our rifles.

Before we went hot on the range I had a pep talk with the guys and told them, "Don't be nervous but to have fun. This will be the last time you shoot real bullets without getting shot at." We all laughed a bit, but they all focused on what they were doing and we did a good job in the mud and rain. I was in the HMMWV on the radio behind the firing line taking contact reports and issuing orders to 45 guys on the ground.

The mission started with 4 guys in watch towers and plywood targets popped up beyond the wall of dirt protecting our perimeter. A few shots rang out in the dark and the report came in from the Platoon leader. He called for the rest of his platoon to join the defense as more targets presented. Lightning flashed illuminating more silhouettes as a volley of rifles broke the sound of the rain in the earth. In pairs the rifles fired and more reports came across as ammo was distributed.

Plywood truck targets and artillery were observed from the lookout towers and the platoon leader called me for reinforcements. The second platoon in the HMMWVs was on its way as the rifles continued to hold the line. Across the radio the second platoon leader reported he was nearing the position and stopped just behind the dirt berm. I signaled and at once all four trucks pulled up and the machine guns were unleashed echoing the thunder and lightning. Tracer rounds bounced off the dirt as flares and lightning flashed across the sky.

I watched the wet soldiers scurry back and forth passing ammo and reports to each other. I sat in my vehicle recording the battle and directing the flow of events. I realized my truck was leaking and I was just as wet. It didn't bother me, I was focused taking casualty reports and plotting artillery rounds. It was a long night, but everyone went home happy, knowing they could perform under pressure and the weather.

The next day we went on a Mounted combat patrol to clear routes along our supply lines. We had to identify suspicious activity and visit a local town. The army has hired several Iraqi refugees to participate in our training and they interact on our simulated battle field serving as translators, officials, bad guys and passers by on the street.

We ended our training with a convoy back to base on the 23rd. I was more excited on Christmas eve putting on a clean dry uniform than I was thinking about opening presents. I took my commander to the airport Christmas Eve and had to find the luggage of another soldier who arrived a week ago at the base. He had only one uniform with him and his bag was lost in transit. So I set off with two of my Sergeants to find him clean clothes. I relaxed in the afternoon and agreed to go out to dinner and a club with half the company. They were very excited that I was coming along. Three weeks ago they hardly knew me and on Christmas eve they would not go out without me. I was there for them on their first real tactical test and they now trust and respect me.

We had Christmas day off and many people had guests. I spent the morning doing laundry and my friend who lives near me is also training here with another battalion picked me up in the evening to watch a movie. His wife flew in from a business trip in China. It was weird not being home with family for Christmas. We spent the last two days conducting land navigation and the powers that be picked another Captain to lead the company, but the process is not finished so I am still in charge and I am keeping him informed of our training. I hope this issue is resolved in three weeks before we go to Kuwait. I am glad I had this opportunity to prove myself, but being in limbo once again has taken a lot out of me.

I hope you all are enjoying your holidays. We got our ballistic plates for our body armor Saturday and I am looking forward to a visit from mom on New Years.

What happened to the Patriots at Miami? Do we still have a chance at the playoffs?

Take care everyone and Happy Holidays.

My New Family

2004-12-13T17:48:00.001+03:00

A quick recap to bring everyone up to speed on what is going on and answer some questions. I reported to my guard unit in Vermont on the 29th of November when we went on Federal activation requiring a train up and validation period of a couple months (for us 34 days). The location of the Mobilization center is in Mississippi.

The training here includes medical and dental processing as well as mandatory briefs on the military legal system the rules of engagement, area specific customs and considerations. We also have completed training on our personal rifles, three types of machine guns and two grenade launchers. Future training includes operating a base camp, mounted convoys land navigation, basic soldier skills, urban combat and reflexive fire techniques. We should finish all this the second week in January and then leave Mississippi for Kuwait. I don't know if we will stop in Germany on the way, but we will spend some time in Kuwait for more weapons qualification and area specific information and most importantly climatization. From there we will road march north in to Iraq and it is likely that we will operate in a base camp in the Najaf Area South of Baghdad. Hopefully we will stay there for our tour. I am already tired of living out of three duffel bags.

I am new to this company, in fact I had not met any people before 29 Nov. However, they all like and respect me. My function here is the Company Executive Officer. I am second in command to the captain and responsible for reporting our actions and status to the higher unit to allow the commander to focus on training or the mission. My other responsibilities include all our equipment from HMMWVS to radios and coordinating supplies and food. I have to be in sync with the commander when he is called away and meet his requirements but I also have to be a sounding board for him to make sure he does not push the company too hard or not hard enough.

The guys from Vermont are interesting. Being from the Northern tank Battalion many of them speak French-Canadian and have a little bit of an accent (well so do the southerners). One of the guys said he heard that the hunting registrations in Vermont are down this year and the deer population is up. Another guy said, "Yeah, we are all down here in Mississippi shooting plastic targets." (The Vermont Guard has about 1200 National Guardsmen, 800 are already deployed and another 300 were activated around the time I left.) We have a Russian who was in the Russian army. One day he said, "Come here, Sir," and I asked what is wrong. He said, "Nothing, I just never see a sober Lieutenant before." He then explained if a Battalion commander didn't like someone he just shot them there on the spot.

We just finished our week of day and night fire on the ranges. It was long days. We had to be on the range at 0630 in the morning and we often did not clear the range until 10pm at night and took the ride home to the barracks. Regulations require we shoot at night for qualification and deployment. Sleep deprivation started setting in and we still had to be able to shoot. Our sister unit from Alabama was shooting with us and they were overcome by the sleep monster. It is funny the places people sleep.

I want to thank everyone again for writing to me and sending me stories and pictures. I'd prefer that people wait to send packages until I am settled in Iraq. Otherwise I'll either have to carry or dump it on the way. I have gotten a few cards and some goodies already and they have been well used. Thank you.

One Week of Duty

2004-12-06T22:27:00.001+03:00

After one week of duty we are finally settled in our temporary home in Mississippi. It has been rainy and humid here. We have been getting up at 3:45 for physical training at 4:15 and are fed, showered, and ready for training at 7am. We have been getting a lot of high speed gear. We were issued our rifles today with the cool scopes and night vision devices as well as the body armor. It looks cool now, but it weighs a lot when you have to run around.

We typically finish company training around 7pm and the platoons do their business and I do administrative stuff until 10 or 11pm. My position is company executive officer. Often abbreviated XO and affectionately dubbed the extra officer, I thought it was because I don't conduct the training of the platoon or company like the platoon leaders or company commander. However, I realize the extra officer does all the extra stuff from unit administration to coordinating supplies, fuel, ammo, and training sites. I have been running around a lot and have my own van and foot power to get things where they need to be.

I have to go throw some laundry in before it gets too late.